“He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord…

A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies” (PV 18:22; 31:10; KJ, NIV)

The brother who desires to marry and he is willing to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit shall surely find his wife. Do not read to fast…I said ‘he shall surely find his wife!’ In the scripture above the wife is called ‘a good thing’. Let the married men say: “I have a good thing!”

The word ‘good’ in Hebrew means something beautiful, pleasant and precious. The wife starts as a good thing and with time, just like the wine, she becomes better, sweeter and wiser. This wife called ‘a good thing’ is filled with the Holy Spirit. She overflows with peace and joy. She is kind and strong. She prays always! She does not complain! She does not manipulate! She will be by your side as a friend, doctor, lover, mother and sister in the same time.

Dear brother, you who desire to marry…what are you looking for in a woman? First of all she has to be a child of God. A woman who fears the Lord shall be praised. Natural beauty is good, it is an asset. But the choice cannot be made only on that for beauty is temporary. This is the greatest disadvantage with all things of the flesh and of the world: they do not last. They come and they go. Only the spiritual blessings remain with you and are truly yours. They even follow you after death as a crown of life. You gather them from this life on earth. Your status in heaven is determined by your faithfulness on this earth. Do not despise the potential each day has to find rubies in the trash rejected, ignored or trampled by men.

Marriage is a very serious ministry. You need a wife who shall be your life- time helper. You cannot hire a wife. Do not marry a woman who is a liability to you. Do not be enticed by her physical beauty. If God does not set His stamp on her as ‘a good thing’ she is a bad thing, a source of sorrow and regret. The marriage certificate cannot change a goat into a sheep. Your wife needs to be strong spiritually. She cannot be a coward, a foolish, wasteful or careless woman. She is not afraid of the future for her trust is in God. She will not be idle, always depending on you for money, counsel, prayers and help. Do not marry a woman you know needs prayer and deliverance even before her wedding day! No matter how beautiful she is do not complicate yourself! You need a woman of God, established in her faith, serving God, with fruit to prove her holy calling. In the area of faithfulness in marriage, you should have 0% doubt about your wife. You should be able to boast in the presence of others that your wife is faithful to you. The woman you are going to marry must be truly ‘the bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh’. For her alone you shall be ready to leave mother and father, to become one flesh with her. Resist the attraction of coming together with dead men’s bones and their strange flesh.

A helper is someone who knows you; your strengths and your weakness, and still, does not run away from you. A helper is someone who will be by your side in your life’s journey. The truth is that life is not easy. But God will give you a helper who will make your life on earth more bearable, even pleasant and peaceful. She will pray for you and help you to change for the better. She will be prudent, an intercessor, restraining the evil that surrounds you. She has to be a good listener and a true friend. A man should never fear the betrayal of his wife. A man should have complete trust in his wife. A godly wife will never abandon you for another man, no matter how rich, handsome or powerful.  Lastly a good wife is a woman who is willing to be a godly mother to your children. These things are declared to be so when you find ‘a good thing’.

Dear brother, Just in case you are discouraged now saying there is no woman like that in your village, I say: ‘pray’ and God will bring one especially for you. God does not tempt His children with impossible dreams and frustrating desires. God put Adam to sleep. Man must sleep before finding his wife. This is a sleep of rest and trust in God. There is no need to worry, to panic and to be troubled in looking for your wife. To the world sleep means nothing. But for the child of God sleep is sweet for the mystery of romance and true love is conceived in his spirit. Weeping may endure for a night but joy comes ‘in the morning’. Sleep brother and rest in the God who loves you. Soon, you shall wake up and find the gift of God, ‘the good thing’ promised knocking at your door. The God for whom nothing is impossible has spoken! Amen!

In Christ I declare:

I rest in the Lord trusting Him for my marriage!

I have a good thing!

I am a good thing!

In Jesus name

Amen!