AGAPE LOVE IN MARRIAGE

Christian wives are commanded to love and submit to their husbands “as to the Lord”. To submit it means willingly allowing another person to have power, authority or control over you. The wife’s submission to her husband is a manifestation of worshipping Jesus, the Head of the Church and proves that God’s Word is true. “A wife should put her husband first, as she does the Lord” (Eph 5:22; CEV). Many wives misunderstand godly submission. They see it as a form of oppression or slavery in marriage. That is a mistake. When Paul wrote this letter, the women were treated as second class citizens, as property, first by their fathers and brothers, and later by their husbands. They now became born again. They became free from all bondages. They could behave and speak as they wished. Paul tells them that as free women in Christ they need to submit to their husbands. Foolish freedom leads to rebellion. The wife does not need to submit to all men. Her submission in this special manner is only to her husband. It is done willingly, lovingly, proving that she is a woman of God.

The best way to understand the act of submission is to see it displayed by our Lord. “And He was withdrawn from them about a stone’s throw, and He knelt down and prayed, 42 saying, “Father, if it is Your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.” 43 Then an angel appeared to Him from heaven, strengthening Him” (Lk 22:41-43). In the Garden of Gethsemane Jesus prays to God the Father. There is a battle of wills. In His human desire Jesus tries to avoid the cup of pain, shame and suffering on the Cross. But as God’s Son, He wants to totally submit to God, to do God’s will to save men. He must become a sin to save sinners. God’s wrath against sin will fall on Jesus. Jesus understands obedience and sacrifice as part of God’s plan for salvation. By submitting to God’s will Jesus declares His total trust in God the Father. As Jesus prays, His disciples struggle to stay awake. This shows the weakness of the human body and mind.

HOW DOES CHRIST LOVES HIS CHURCH? CHRIST DOES NOT CONDEMN US!

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation [no guilty verdict, no punishment] for those who are in Christ Jesus [who believe in Him as personal Lord and Savior]” (Rom 8:1; AMP). Condemnation is a legal term, declaring that someone is evil and must go to hell. When someone is accused of a crime and comes before the judge, he is either condemned or he is vindicated from all charges. In Greek, the word ‘condemnation’ means guilty verdict, penalty and punishment. The word “now” shows the present reality of those who are saved. In the court, God, the Supreme Judge, declares that for Christ’ sake, the accused is not guilty of sin, and he must not be punished for it. Those who believe that Jesus died for them and took the punishment for their sins, are justified by grace and thru faith. This is a fact: there is no more condemnation for the believers in Christ. They have a new spiritual position and status because of their mystical unity with Christ. The Law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus brings them eternal life and freedom by the Holy Spirit. The believers are eternally free from the fear, guilt, shame and punishment of sin because of their faith in Christ crucified. This freedom is not given by merit. It is purely by grace!

In the setup of marriage, the husband and wife must stop condemning one another. If God does not condemn your spouse, you too should do the same! Condemnation is more than criticizing. When husband and wife speak negative words to each other, producing shame or guilt, they go against God’s Word that says there is no more condemnation for those who are saved. Husbands and wives, control your tongue. By insulting your spouse, you disobey God’s Law. That is dangerous. See each other as God’s children and spiritual heirs together with Christ. “Do not let unwholesome [foul, profane, worthless, vulgar] words ever come out of your mouth, but only such speech as is good for building up others, according to the need and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing to those who hear [you speak]” (Eph 4:29; AMP). The word ‘unwholesome’ means rotten fruit. Don’t speak negative, hurtful ugly words. Speak blessings! Speak Life!