“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear” (1Pet 3:1-6)

We all desire to be women of God. Here we are given Sarah as an example of a ‘holy woman of the past’. But the Bible is not just a history book. It is the ever living Word of God, a present help in times of need. By the grace of God, we shall study how to become ‘holy women of the present!’

One of the most difficult commands to obey is this: ‘Wives submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord!’ Submission is one of the laws of the Kingdom of God. This submission is not forced. It is the wife’s free choice done for the sake of Christ who, as a man, submitted Himself to God the Father. It is also done for the sake of the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Finally, the submission is done for the common good of the family. Please observe that the wives do not submit to all men. This command means submission only to their husbands and it is done ‘as unto the Lord’. It is easier for a believing wife to submit to her Christian husband. This is because he loves her as Christ loves the church. But it is extremely difficult to submit to an unbelieving husband. The believing wife is not exempted just because her husband is not saved. Rebellion and pride are sins. Her submission is expected even in this difficult situation. The question is this: As wives, how do we submit ‘successfully’?

*Sometimes, silence is louder than words!

First of all, the wife has to be truly born again. She knows that only God can change her husband’s heart. She does not try to manipulate his will, for that is called witchcraft. She will build herself in the most holy faith by the Word of God and by prayer. Except he specifically requests to hear the word of God, she may not preach to him! Let him go to church and listen to the pastor! Preaching to such a man at home will only add fuel to his stubbornness. She has to learn to control her tongue! Submission means that she will humble herself, go down to his level and discuss with him only ‘natural’ things. She will ask him about his job, his health and the children. If he does not ask for prayer, she may not volunteer to pray aloud. This spiritual quietness is a weapon that the Holy Spirit uses to break the stubborn will of the man. ‘Wife, always be led by the Holy Spirit!’

*In spiritual warfare, fashion is a useless and deceptive weapon!

The wife cannot impress him with anything in the natural. Her good sense of fashion, her beautiful dresses and hair styles, none of these are useful to touch her husband’s spirit. Even if he compliments her for the dresses she wears, there is no lasting spiritual gain coming from such a compliment. Here we see the weakness of fashion. It is more a form of entertainment with no eternal value at all. Once you understand this, you will not be frustrated when your husband does not notice your new dress or your latest hair style. This wisdom is the opposite of what is called common sense. The wisdom of the world says that the more fashionable you are, the stronger your marriage will be. But that is a lie. It took me many years and many prayers to finally believe this revelation. I am not saying that you should dress carelessly. But if you dress beautifully, let it be for the glory of God and not only for the pleasure of your husband.

In Christ I declare:

My marriage is successful!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!