MARRIAGE COUNSELLING (3)

I AM QUIET, GENTLE, PRECIOUS AND BEAUTIFUL
“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God” (1Pet 3:1-4)

MY TESTIMONY AS A WIFE
I shall now boast in the Lord! My husband and I are married for 42 years. In Christ and by the grace of God, I declare that I am quiet, gentle, precious and beautiful! The Word of God says so! My husband says so! What others say it does not matter. I have learned over the years to speak less than my husband, especially when we are in public. For example, if he speaks 10 words, I speak maybe 3. If he is not around I can speak 8. You may joke about it, but this is the truth. I mentally count the times I open my mouth. If I do not have something good and godly to say, I am not ashamed to keep quiet. I do not have to prove that I am intelligent by talking.

When I talk, I make sure that I am on my husband’s ‘side’. I do not come from the opposite side. I do not stand against him spiritually speaking. I do not threaten him positionally. I am never on the side of them who argue with him, even if jokingly. If I do not understand something he says I make a mental note to ask him at home. I do not want to ask him any question while others listen to us talking. If it is an ‘emergency’ I ask him in Romanian. Thank God, most people do not understand this language. I do this because I do not want to be seen as his boss, teacher or mentor. I gladly submit to him because of God’s command. I also do not ask other men questions in my husband’s presence. I do not want to be seen as a foolish ignorant wife. That attitude will place the blame on him implying that he did not teach me well at home.

You may ask… What is my ‘gain’ in all this? My gain is God’s pleasure over our home! The Holy Spirit is free to move, and work in us from inside out. Both my husband and I are ‘work in progress’ but if I obey God’s Word, the progress is faster. I love that!

The devil loves to ask questions causing division, doubts, fears and confusion. I pray before I talk. I choose when to answer or when not to answer a question that is ‘thrown’ at me. My husband is the only one who has the right to demand answers from me. No other person has the same right. I do not regret talking too little but I regret talking too much. This strategy of keeping quiet (well… most of the time) is not legalistic or religious. It is the result of the leading of the Holy Spirit who gives me the power to choose silence when silence is the winner. To God be all the glory!

Advertisements

2 comments on “MARRIAGE COUNSELLING (3)

  1. loriloganvance says:

    Wow, this is like medicine for me! I have not been doing well in this area, and I am convicted by the Spirit after reading this. I am grateful to God for His conviction, for it means there is still hope for me! People have often said about me that I am too quiet, so to compensate, I began talking more than I should. I lost that discipline of controlling my tongue, especially around my husband, and now I am asking God for his help to be disciplined, to control my tongue and speak when I have a good thing to say.

  2. Silvia Leigh says:

    Well done Lori! The Holy Spirit is in control!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s