MY QUESTIONS HAVE TO WAIT

 

A question is a sentence used to find out information from another. In an exam, a question is a problem that tests a person’s knowledge or ability: A question produces doubt about the truth of something, creating confusion in the minds. The devil was the one who asked the first question in the Bible. “Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Has God indeed said, ‘You shall not eat of every tree of the garden’?” (Gen 3:1). According to the definition of the word ‘question’ these are the motives in the devil’s mind when he talked to Eve: he wanted that she should open her heart to him. The devil wanted that Eve should give him more information about her relationship with God, about her marriage and her life in general. As you can see, a question provokes an answer. This is an invitation to intimacy, a manipulation to close friendship, stolen love…

 

This is a spiritual lesson: When the devil is asking you a question, you should totally refuse to answer him. You rebuke him instantly! Do not cooperate with him! For that, you need to know the difference between the voice of God and that of the devil!!! You should not give the devil any information about your life, not even jokingly! Secondly, when the devil is asking you a question he wants to test your knowledge about God and His Word. If you fail the test, the devil will be more confident to attack you further. For example, when Eve replied that God said they should not eat or touch the forbidden fruit, the devil immediately attacked her again, tempting her to disobey God’s command. This is because Eve misquoted God’s command. God did not say that if they touch the fruit they will die. Eve failed the test of the devil’s question. As a teacher, the devil ‘punished’ his student called Eve. All Eve’s daughters are still paying the price for their mother’s foolishness.

 

The devil’s question was designed to create doubt and confusion about God’s character and love towards men. This doubt is a poisonous arrow creating anxiety and inferiority complex. Eve started thinking that she is too foolish and she needs more wisdom so that next time she can impress ‘Teacher-devil’ with her intelligent answers. She forgot that God created her perfect and she needed nothing more than an intimate relationship with her Maker. Looking for that wisdom, she eats the forbidden fruit and convinces her husband to do the same. Sin and death entered their spirits and bodies that very moment. This is the story of the fall. The deadly effects of sin can only be destroyed at the Cross of Christ.

 

Since Eve’s deception, women in particular have struggled with (many) questions and (fewer) answers ever since. Many are still confused about who to ask and when to ask questions. They still struggle with doubts and confusion more than the men. They still have inferiority complexes about their intelligence and wisdom. They still want to impress men with their education and intelligence. That attitude makes them look childish. In the Bible there is a restrain upon women, not to ask questions in public. This is so that they will not reinforce their inferiority complexes and expose their foolishness to outsiders. “If they (the wives) have any questions, they should ask their husbands at home, for it is improper for women to speak in church meetings” (1Cor 14:35). For married couples, asking questions and giving answers is to be done at home, in a quiet, safe and loving atmosphere. The Holy Spirit is your Teacher.

 

MY TESTIMONY AS A WIFE

May years ago, based on my understanding of the Word of God, I decided that I will never ask my husband any question in public. I can talk to him in public on any subject. He can ask me any question he likes. I will answer him to the best of my knowledge. But my strategy is not to ask him back anything! (Of course, if it is matter of life and death, I will break my rule). Generally, when we are in public, I am very careful with my words, with the tone of my voice and with my body language. I made up my mind not to talk to him as I am his boss or judge. I will not query him. He is not my child. Even if what he says sounds terrible to me and I ‘die’ for an explanation, I will wait for us to go home. I learned how to wait… Inside, I can ask all the questions I want. We are safe from the world. I do not want to be seen to be his teacher, his older sister, his mother or his pastor. My voice does not go higher in tone, does not become harsh, demanding or threatening. My body language speaks of love and submission too. I do not stand ‘tall’ ‘towering’ over him, intimidating him or bullying him, not even jokingly. I know that many women ‘joke’ with their husbands’ feelings. This is their excuse to fight back. It does not work with me. My husband does not approve of jokes that make us look foolish, divisive or rude. I too have learned to behave well, to protect the ‘image’ of our marriage, not to give the devil any foot hold to use something against us. I am very protective of his reputation and honor. I trust him with my life and he trusts me with his. This trust has not come easily. Many tears of regret and repentance have flown under the bridge of God’s mercy. But we are so much better now… Dear reader, there is hope for you too. Our testimony as a happy married couple is one of our greatest accomplishments on earth. It has become a ministry for the encouragement of many people. To God alone be all the glory!

Tali and I 11

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