MARRIAGE IS A GOOD THING (27)
“But, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ” (Eph 4:15)
Truth is a Person. Jesus Christ said: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life”. Two thousand years ago, the world judged, rejected, condemned and killed the Truth. I am speaking about Christ Crucified. The only way to know the Truth now, it is by the personal revelation of the same Christ. This is done thru the work of the Holy Spirit, also called the Spirit of Truth. Without the Holy Spirit, anything you know as truth in your life is in fact a lie. Any word you have heard about yourself, if it was not spoke under the influence of the Holy Spirit, that word is a lie! Parents lie to children. Husbands lie to their wives. Deception is a global plague that no man can stop. The devil is a liar and the father of all lies. The world is its domain. Truth is not what makes you feel good. Bad news can be true. Truth is not democratic. The majority may be deceived. Truth is not what you believe. A lie believed is still a lie. Truth is truth!
In Greek, truth means revelation, the removal of the veil and hiding nothing. It conveys the thought that truth is always there, always open and available for all to see. The veil that covers the truth is the blindness of unbelief, the judgment of God upon the world. You cannot discover the truth by study or by mistake. You must be lead into the truth by the Holy Spirit. That is why God takes the glory for every drop of truth you possess. The Hebrew word for “truth” means long lasting faithful strength. It implies an everlasting substance that you can trust!
The audible sign of spiritual maturity is found in the scripture above: speaking the truth in love! It takes many years of carrying your cross in Christ to be able to obey this command. This type of speech is a blessing, building relationships in the church and all godly marriages. It is not easy to speak the truth at any time. The evil spirit of religion and lies hidden in your hearer’s heart will instantly fight back. This is because truth is able to set free from all bondages. The devil will hate you for speaking the truth to his prisoners. You shall encounter the backlash of the tongue. You shall be accused as a trouble maker. Truth is always confrontational and creates enemies. Truth separates people. Lies are temporary. Lies are chains of bondage coming from the powers of darkness. But truth is part of the protective armor in spiritual warfare. Truth is like dynamite. Once spoken, it can never be hidden. Truth is everlasting and will always win. If you trust in a lie, you shall be disappointed. If you trust and speak the truth, God will vindicate you!
Truth is like bitter medicine. For a patient to swallow it must be wrapped in a sweet coating. Jesus came to bring Grace and Truth. Without grace and love, a sinner will vomit the truth. That is why you are commanded to speak the truth in such a way that your listener will not reject it. It is not enough to speak the truth. It has to be wrapped in a cover of love. This packaging of love does not mean sweet talking, flattering or pretending to be soft. Love is not just a romantic feeling. Love is as strong as death. Love is a fighter for the interests of the beloved. Love is patient and kind. Love is not rude and not selfish. Love does not harm the hearer. There shall be no damage, no loss and no failure when truth wrapped in love is given to another. A wise man said once: “For truth to be spoken in love you need the heavenly music of grace”. That sounds wonderful to my ears…it shall be power to my lips!
This is my personal testimony…
A successful marriage is always the result of victory in spiritual warfare. It has nothing to do with beauty of with money. There are times when my husband and I need to confront one another. These issues can be about our marriage, children, finances or ministry. Speaking the truth in love is the only way to establish the unity of peace. It is also the only way to make genuine progress in a difficult situation. We have learned over the years to pray before we speak. We are also good listeners. We ask the Holy Spirit for the timing of such a painful confrontation. As for me, Queen Esther is my teacher and my model, especially when I have to tell my husband some ‘negative’ things. Esther was in trouble. She had to bring some bitter truth to the attention of the king, her husband. It is not easy to tell your husband that his best friend wants to kill all his in- laws. She did it in such a way that the king saw the truth spoken in love and he yielded to it. The choice of words, the body language, the attitude of humility and respect are part of the eternal wrappings of love.
For example, I NEVER command my husband to do anything! Even if it is very important to me! I can suggest a way of action and I leave it like that. I can say: “What do you think about this…” I give him time to see the truth I see. Impatience in marriage is criminal. I also NEVER raise my voice to my husband! That type of shout is useless in any relationship. It can only damage the respect and trust. If I have to correct my husband I keep my spiritual focus on Jesus Christ and the grace available by faith in Him. I identify with my husband’s weakness and together we draw courage from the cross. I NEVER say to my husband: “I told you so!” If God vindicates my stand, and my husband comes back to say that I was right, I never end that sweet moment of grace with any word of pride! I have never regretted true humility and patience as a garment to cover my sinful flesh. This is how our marriage has survived and has overcome many hidden traps and snares planted by the devil. That is why I say: to God be all the glory!
In Christ I declare:
I shall always speak the truth in love!
I shall never lie!
My marriage is blessed!
My ministry is blessed!
In Jesus name