“Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God” (1Cor 6:9, 10)

There are 104 million alcoholics in this world. Recently, I had to counsel some women who are married to alcoholics. Their once ‘sweet’ husbands became monsters, abusive and violent. A wife told me that in 20 years of marriage the husband often attacked her with his fists and feet, the kitchen knife, the hammer and the mortar used to make pounded yam. This happened each time the husband was drunk. When he was sober he will apologies and buy gifts for her. But then, he will drink again and the bitter circle continues. She wanted to be faithful to the marriage vows but the violence was too much. She wept and wept… Sadly, for the sake of her life and children, I had to tell her to separate from her husband. It is painful to say that these are ‘Christian’ people.

Read this sad letter: “My addiction to alcohol built steadily and, before I realized it, I had become a morning as well as an afternoon drinker. I decided to stop drinking. I was awake most of that night. By noon the next day every bone in my body ached because I needed another drink. I tried to resist it but I could not. I will run to the place I kept the bottles. In a blind panic, I nervously poured a glass full of gin, my hands shaking so violently that I spilled half the bottle. As I gulped it down, I could feel the agony gradually lessening. Then I finally knew the terrible truth: I was hooked. I couldn’t quit. I became a slave to the bottle…”

I never drank alcohol in my life but as a medical doctor I know and I have seen the ravages of this ‘slow poison’. Alcohol affects the body, the mind, the emotions, the relationships and the social behavior. Most marriages break down because of alcohol. The children suffer immensely.

Why do people drink? Most of them it is to escape the stress of life. Like a child wanting to play with a new toy, they want to try a new pleasure. But the Bible says that you should not use your body to experiment with sin, with alcohol or sex. This is because your body is not your own. It belongs to God!!! Sin leads to sickness, poverty, shame and untimely death! We are commanded to glorify God with our bodies!  (1Cor 6:18-20)

The Bible has two types of messages about drinking alcohol. Some seem to encourage some drinking. ‘Wine gladdens the heart…’ (Ps 104:15). But there are others that condemn it. In Proverbs 23 you see that alcohol is responsible for much unnecessary sorrow, broken hearts, scattered dreams and lifelong shame. The drunkard will come to poverty. He will see strange things and will not be able to separate reality from imagination. That is a crazy troubled man. The drunkard needs Jesus, if not he will go to hell. Sad but true!

This is the counsel I give to you, especially to you, the young people? The best thing you can do is never drink at all! Do not be curious about alcohol, drugs or premarital sex! There is nothing good in sin!  Alcohol is a wicked master, addicting and controlling. No man plans to become an addict with the first bottle of beer. But the truth is that most people who take a sip end up as addicts. For sure: you will regret your first sip. But you will never regret abstinence. Remember that drinking alcohol is a choice! Do your choices bring glory to God? Do your choices are helpful to you and others (to your spouse, children)? Do my choices make me a slave?

Finally, with a trembling heart and praying, I say: you who are already a drunkard, you who are already on the road of destruction, I beg you to listen…Stop now and think!  Please remember God, your Maker!!!! God loves you! Please pray to God! Pray to Jesus!!! I am not speaking as a doctor now! I am speaking as a servant of God, as a mother, grandmother, pastor and friend! If the devil in the bottle tells you that your case is hopeless, that you will die an addict… that is a lie! The devil is a liar! Come to Jesus! There is still hope for you! Jesus Christ is Lord!!!

Today, my husband and I, we celebrate 42 years of happy, blessed and fruitful marriage! To God be all the glory!

“No soldier in active service ENTANGLES himself in the affairs of everyday life (“civilian pursuits”), so that he may please the One Who enlisted him as a soldier“(2Timothy 2:4)

What is the meaning of ENTANGLED? It means to be interwoven, wrapped or twisted together in such a manner as not to be easily extricated. An entangled man is difficult to be freed from what binds or hinders him.

This is a good illustration: In Brazil there grows a creeping plant which forest-dwellers call ‘the matador’ or ‘the murderer’. It attacks strong trees and kills them. Its slender stem creeps along the ground, but no sooner does it meet a vigorous tree, than it sends out an entangling tentacle, which cleaves and climbs up the tree, at intervals sending out arm-like branches that further entangle the tree. As the “murderer” ascends, these ligatures grow larger and their clasp becomes tighter, suffocating the tree.  Up and up the rogue vine climbs until the top of the tree is conquered. Then, as if in triumph, the parasite shoots a huge, flowery head above the strangled tree. From the dead tree’s crown, it scatters its seed to the ground, to begin its deadly work again.

In a similar way the everyday affairs of this world can subtly entangle the soldiers of Christ. The love of the world neutralizes their effectiveness in the ongoing spiritual war with the flesh and the devil. The active warfare mind becomes dull, in a false comfort of a fake peace. The backsliding Christians become weak and confused as their falling begins. They are not aware of it until too late. King David, fell to adultery and murder when he stayed behind at the time kings go to war. The lust of his eyes entangled him until he sinned against God and men.    Another tragic example is Samson who became entangled by his lust for Delilah. Both these great men paid dearly for their sins.

Many of God’s children have suffered a spiritual stroke. They are entangled, anxious, surrounded by imaginary troubles. They fight battles they should not fight. They ignore battles they should go and fight. It is a sad story of failure in the midst of plenty.

What is the solution? The only solution is to desire to please Jesus Christ, your Lord and Commander. He called you to Himself and He enlisted you as a soldier in His army. He did not call you to play around. He did not call you to enjoy sin! He called you to do His work. You need to endure hardship as a form of discipline. Do not make friends with the ‘civilians’, with the religious unbelievers. The battle field is not Disneyland. You need to study, know and obey His Word. You need to pray for the strength to stay faithful! This is the sure promise of the Holy Spirit: if you stay close to your Savior, no devil, no creepy murderer shall be able to surround you, to kill you. No poisonous arrow shall puncture your heart! There is safety in obedience! There is hope in humility and wisdom! Be faithful to Jesus Christ! This is a warning of love!

“So he, trembling and astonished, said, “Lord, what do You want me to do?” Then the Lord said to him, “Arise and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do” (Ac 9:6)

This month my husband and I, we celebrate 16 years of full time ministry as founders and pastors of Father’s House Bible Church. I still remember the power of God’s call upon my life. It will never leave me for as long as I live. This is our testimony: My husband and I we worked as medical doctors in Nigeria since 1980. We had a successful practice that brought us wealth and fame. In 1998, my husband and I decided to go to America. We were in the US for more than a year. We left behind our successful private hospital in Warri called ‘Lily Clinic’. We went over there with our children not knowing what God has in mind for us as a family.  Because many said that working in America as doctors will bring more money than in Nigeria (and our common sense convinced us that this is a good idea) we decided to enroll and pass the exams so that we can practice there. We bought the necessary text books and paid the fees for the first exam. We started reading the books with all the seriousness of medical students.  But God had a different plan. Some months passed…

Suddenly, the Holy Spirit spoke: ‘I did not bring you here to America so that you work as doctors. That season of your life is finished. I want to use you in My kingdom and for My glory. Go back to Nigeria and do ministry. From now on you shall work for Me! I place on you the apostolic-prophetic mantle of true missionaries. Go back to Warri and sell your hospital. Use the building as a church. Call it Father’s House Bible Church. I will be with you and teach you all you need to be pastors and spiritual leaders. Leave the children behind and I will take care of them better than if you were here with them.  Obey My command and you shall never regret it.  The best part of your life starts now. You shall be leaders of revival in Nigeria. Obey Me and see what I will do. But be sure to give Me alone all the glory for the success that will come…’

Both my husband and I received these same words separately. When we talked to each other about what God has said, we were shocked to discover that He said the same thing to each of us. God wanted each one of us to obey His call separately and together as a couple. In this way, no one needs to explain the vision to the other. Each one of us will be directly responsible to God for the words we speak and the things we do. In this way there is no need to ‘carry one another on the back’. No one will be a liability to the other. Each one will freely move in the Spirit, manifesting his own peculiar gifts without over-depending on another and still keeping the unity of the Spirit intact.

Looking back, I thank God that my husband and I said ‘yes’ to the call of God. We did so independently and together as a team.  We came back to Nigeria in November 1999. We started Father’s House Bible Church in March 2000. It is 16 years since then. God has been faithful. God is good. God’s promise to be with us, to teach us how to be pastors and leaders is fulfilled. It is true that since we chose to obey God’s call and start this church our life is the happiest. God has been faithful in taking care of our children and grandchildren. He has done much more than words can tell.

This morning I want to say “Thank You Father! Thank You Son! Thank You Holy Ghost! For the success of our ministry, for the harvest of souls, for the happiness in our marriage, for the prosperity of our children, natural and spiritual, for the opportunity to preach the truth, to pray and worship freely, for these are so many other blessings, we say Thank You Lord Jesus! All glory goes to You alone!”

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me. And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand. I and My Father are one.” (Jn 10:27-30)

One of the most important Bible doctrines is called ‘The assurance of salvation’. It says that as a believer it is possible to be sure that you are saved and that you are going to heaven. Many argue for or against this doctrine. But no matter what men say, it is true that you can have this assurance while you live in earth. It is God’s promise!

Once you give your life to Christ you become born again by the power of the Holy Spirit. That moment heaven becomes your eternal home. Jesus Christ gives you not just life, but eternal life. This eternal life is not just an unending life, but a special life, the life of God in you. Now you are a child of God. But you discover that you still struggle with doubts about your salvation. You need to receive the grace gift called ‘the assurance of your salvation’. The truth is that very few Christians have this assurance. Most of them live their lives tormented by doubts. They live in a space between earth and heaven, hanging there between fears and hope. They are like a boat on the waves, always up and down. When things are good, they have hope that they are saved. When trials come, they doubt it.

Most pastors do not emphasize this doctrine. The believers are ignorant of their blessings. For example, the Roman Catholic Church declares that it is possible to have the assurance of salvation. But they say that this gift is given only to some few special holy men called saints. But in Christ the promise of eternal life and the assurance of salvation is promised and given to all the born again believers who desire to have it. Even in the evangelical churches things are not much better. The preachers tell their congregation that you can lose your salvation on your way to heaven. The Christians are always in doubt if they can ‘make heaven’ or not. If you tell them that you are sure of your salvation they take it as arrogance and they reject the doctrine. The truth is that salvation is of God. We did not contribute anything to the salvation of our souls. Jesus died on the Cross and paid the price for our sin that we may have eternal life. Jesus said that no one can snatch a child of God from His hand and from His Father’s hand. He says that God the Father is ‘greater than all’ gods and demons. Do you believe that?

This assurance of salvation does not come automatically to the believer. It does not come thru external proofs. For example, a sick man can be healed miraculously by God. But even after the healing he still struggles with doubts about his identity as a Christian. The assurance of salvation comes only from faith in the Word of God. This is not a easy way. It comes thru the diligent study of the Word of God. It takes a long time to come to it. The assurance of salvation means to have the victory against the sin of doubt. Salvation is free for us because Jesus paid it all on the Cross. But to obtain the assurance of salvation, there is a price to pay. It takes years of diligent study of the Word of God, prayer and faithful obedience to the leading of the Holy Spirit before God grants it to you. What a gift that is!!! You become free of doubts concerning your identity as a child of God. That is the mind of Christ. Prayer becomes easier than breathing. Worship becomes ‘natural’. You become bold in your faith like never before. From that time on that you begin to enjoy your Christianity.

If any has ears to hear, let him do so!

 
“There is no holiness without a warfare”
(J. C. Ryle 1816-1900)

if you want to be like Jesus, then you need to defeat the flesh and the prince of this world. You need to put on the whole armor of God, fight the devil and win before you can rest, take your flute and sing! You fight so that you can worship The Lord! You take your soldier’ boots before you put on the dancing shoes! Praise is a sacrifice!

“The Lord shall increase you more and more, you and your children. You are blessed of the Lord which made heaven and earth” (Ps 115:14, 15)

This is the promise of God: if you are born again, God will make sure that your children (natural and spiritual) shall multiply in numbers and that their present blessings shall increase! Their faith, peace, joy, strength, wisdom, love for God, hunger for righteousness, desire to please God, anointing for ministry and living in the hope of glory shall increase day by day! The curse of barrenness, poverty, loneliness and lack is destroyed!

 
“The anger of a fool becomes readily apparent, but the prudent person overlooks an insult” (PV 12:16)

We just arrived at Istanbul airport. There was a turkish family: a man, his wife and two little children. The man blocked the door of the airport bus with a lot of luggage. An old man and his wife ( they looked like foreigners, maybe Americans) wanted to enter. He kindly asked the younger man to make some space for him to enter in. That was all he said…

‘I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace’ (Eph 4:1-3)

Paul wrote this letter from a cold dirty cell in the prison in Rome. He was isolated from other people. He longs for the fellowship of the brethren. He tells us about the power of the unity of the Spirit that make relationships to last forever. This advice applies to all friendships in general, and to marriages in particular.

We are on a short visit in the US. Many are confused about marriage. They want to be independent and married in the same time. This is more so here in America. They worship the idol of independence until they become isolated, lonely, confused and sad. To be independent it means to be free from the control, authority or influence of another. It means to be free from the help or resources of another person. This may sound good to some but this attitude is spiritual poison in marriage.

The wives fear submission thinking that they lose their ‘personalities’ as single independent and successful women. The husbands fear to love their wives ‘too much’. This fear keeps all of them on parallel lines never merging into one. Houston is a very busy city. I have seen how the husbands and the wives, each driving their own cars, they roll down the windows and greet in the traffic. They text one another or talk on the phone from the ‘privacy’ of their own cars. Each one laughs or weeps alone. The cars are very many and very beautiful. But there are so few human beings on the streets, talking face to face or hugging each other. This division and separation between people makes them vulnerable and foolish. The devil keeps them ‘independent’ and happy. But this happiness is not deep and does not last.

Marriage is a blessing because it is designed by God who created us. That alone must be the reason why marriage must be happy and fulfilled. It is my opinion that many men and women desire a happy marriage but are confused about the way to achieve that. They are not willing to pay the price for the joy of fulfillment as husbands and wives. Time does not improve matters. Older men and women accept the idea that mid life crisis means adultery and divorce. They say it is normal to abuse and cheat. This is a sad story I see…

This is our testimony… When my heart is overwhelmed with the cares of life and the anxiety of success, when the burden of men and women around me is too much for me to help, I abandon everything and I run… I hide in the everlasting arms of my God. This is the secret of my joy in this world. This is the key of my peace in my marriage. I submit to my husband not only when I feel like or when things are ‘sweet’. I submit to him even when he is tired or angry. Life is generally stressful but both of us have learned to keep the unity of the Spirit no matter the pressure from outside or the frustration from inside. We enter the tunnel of trial together and come out at the other side still one, even closer and stronger. The darkness tries to separate us but we have learned to stay together if we understand the attack or not.

The unity of the Spirit is the most important treasure we have in the marriage. If that is broken, we cannot be happy even if we have children, money or success. That is why we treasure this spiritual unity and are very jealous to protect it. We are directly responsible to God to keep it intact and fruitful. We have to answer to the One who put us together as husband and wife! We have learned to understand one another, to respect and protect each other. We have learned to be patient and gentle, strong and humble with each other. We eagerly and seriously try to keep and maintain this unity in the bond of peace! We do not want to be ‘independent’ and married. We want to be one! We want to be happily married and give glory to God in all we say or do! This is not just our wish for the future but our present living and holy testimony! To a God be all the glory! And that is all that matters!

Dear child, Sometimes you are too hard on yourself. That gives the tone to others to attack you with more judgment. Accept yourself the way you are and pray to be better. It is not by your power that you change. Give God alone the credit and the glory for every change you see in your character and circumstances, big or small. For your heart belongs to God and not to yourself. Yes, relax and enjoy today. It is already a beautiful morning, designed by God.
As for me, I do not allow others, and not even myself to spoil my day. I rejoice always, as I am commanded by the Lover of my soul. I always want to please Him who died that I might live. I want to make my Jesus happy. That is why you see me giving God thanks always. It is not just a formula, but my life style.
A merry heart is like medicine (PV 17:22). Don’t forget to take your daily dose of merriment. Not just because today is more special than others. But because you serve a ‘Special’ God.
‘Arise and shine for your light has come and the glory of The Lord rises upon you’ (Is 60:1). It has reached your ankles. Soon it will be at your knees, then up to your chest, and finally, all over you. This is the Word of God for you this morning.
I love you in Christ alone,
Your mother.

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (PV 15:1)

We just arrived at our hotel late in the evening. We were both tired at the end of a long flight. But we are always ready to serve God, prepared for any opportunity to give Him the glory. The lady at the reception told my husband to write the name of his wife on the form. This is unusual. But we felt the nudge of the Holy Spirit to say something at this point. We told her that we have been married for 42 years. She said ‘wow…this must be a serious commitment to stay together for better and for worse…I could have liked to tell others the same but I can’t… This is so great…what is your secret, guys?’ We told her that the open secret is God in the centre of our marriage. We said that when we promised to stay married to the end, we meant every word for God is a God of covenant, who keeps His promises. He is the faithful God who blesses His faithful children. We owe to God to have the testimony of a successful marriage. It will give Him the glory!

Marriage is not easy. In fact, it is a lot of work to make it successful. From the many lessons learned along the way, this is one: ‘be angry but sin not!’ (Eph 4:26, 27). There is a great difference between a gentle and a harsh word. The same conversation in the morning, can turn into peace or into war before midnight. The storm may quench or may become a hurricane before the close of the day. The boat of marriage may open the sails to enjoy the evening breeze or it may crash on the rocks of regret that same day.

The devil is real. He wants to ‘kill, steal and destroy’. When the devil attacks with anger, he will advise you to cooperate and increase it the more. He will provide free fuel to the arguments so that you alone will take the blame for the damage. Greedy and lazy people love free things and they end up being cheated. This is a very common strategy of the enemy. He starts the trouble and he will tell you how to continue it. Little disagreements turn to ugly battles where only the devil is a winner. This is a lesson you must learn and practice always if your desire is to keep your relationship and enjoy it to the end.

The first thing you see is that wrath and anger are common emotions with all men. To some, these emotions manifest higher than to others. But these are common to all. When you admire a so called wise and cool headed man or woman, just know that this is not the all story. In the privacy of home, anger, jealousy, bitterness and hurtful words are spoken and exchanged. No man is perfect except our Lord. He is the eternal fountain of wisdom and the teacher of them who are willing to be His disciples. It is not enough to say ‘I will never be angry, no matter what any man does to me…I will always avoid trouble… ‘ These words sound good but are not practical in ‘the marathon race’ of an intimate relationship like marriage.

Please observe that when the evil spirit of division enters uninvited thru the door of testing, when the passion of harsh words comes into your home, when quarrels seem useful, you should recognize it as an evil attack! The earlier you do that the better. Words spoken in anger are designed to hurt. Later, even after forgiveness, the wounds of bitter anger are difficult to heal. The best is to speak less and speak calmly. You can see that keeping a quiet grudge is not the solution! It is a ‘gentle answer’ that The Holy Spirit uses as a standard against the flood of evil high temper. You need to say something! Quietness is not always the best! What you say and how you say it determines the end of that crisis. This is spiritual warfare and you need to be prepared to give a gentle and humble answer of wisdom based on the Word of God. That is why you store the Word in your heart!

Both examples of negative and positive influence are found in the story of Abigail and her husband Nabal. The harsh words of Nabal (which means a fool) provoked anger in David who was now ready to kill him. But Abigail stopped that flood of evil and death thru her gentle answer of wisdom, humility and peace. Do not imitate hot headed fools! Do not attend their parties! Do not give the devil space thru anger, ignorance or foolishness! Be like Abigail! This is how you shall enjoy your marriage until Jesus comes! This is the secret of success in any relationship that God has blessed you with.

Pay the price for a godly enduring testimony, to the glory of God! You may have many regrets in life, but you shall never regret being wise and gentle under provocation, patient, loving, kind and humble. For these are the fruits of the Holy Spirit and against such, there is no law to condemn! Be like Jesus! Let your light shine in that darkness where God, in His sovereign will, has planted you! Be an ambassador for Christ thru gentle answers spoken in His name and for His glory! Take this challenge! The reward is greater than what you can imagine! In Jesus name, amen!

“Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you… Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life” (Rev2:10)

Unfortunately, adultery and divorce are very common sins, even among the Christians. The devil is not original. The same ‘basic’ sins are the reasons for the fall of many believes. But I want to encourage all believers that it is possible to remain faithful to The Lord, even to the end! Backsliding may seem fashionable! So many backsliders still go on with their ministries like nothing happened. Many see backsliding as just ‘a normal phase’ in the Christian race. They think that a backslider can come back to Jesus just by wishing it or by a little prayer of repentance. The truth is not so easy…

You may chose to sin any time you wish but you cannot come back to the fullness of Christ any time you wish. Crucifying Christ the second time is not a small sin. The process of restoration is under the direction and control of the Holy Spirit. The Cross must speak on your behalf! It is a hard and difficult road… It is possible to come back. The prodigal son came back. But much pain can be avoided if we remain faithful to Jesus, to the One who died that we may live for Him!

This is what the Bible teaches: salvation is eternal! A true born again child of God cannot lose his salvation!!! He cannot become a child of the devil even if he falls into sin. He cannot go to hell. There are many who argue this but the doctrine is true. Now this is the question: if a believer does not lose his salvation, what does he lose?

A backsliding believer loses fellowship with God, peace and joy in the Holy Ghost! He loses sense of direction making too many mistakes. He loses his good and fruitful testimony. In fact he now has a negative ‘testimony’. He loses his spiritual sight, becomes blind and bound like Samson. He loses his assurance of salvation. He loses his godly wisdom and becomes foolish. Even if he still goes to church, he becomes timid about his faith. He loses his spiritual balance and falls easily into sin. He loses his faith in miracles and his rewards in heaven. He grieves and quenches the Spirit of God.

The foundation of a believer is very important. Why do you say that you are saved? What are the motives that you still remain loyal to Christ? Why do you stay faithful to your Lord? What is the secret to a long time faithful and fruitful testimony as a servant of God? Some believers stay faithful only for as long as they ‘gain something’ from Jesus. Others stay faithful because they fear going to hell. But the truth is that visible gains and emotions change with time. If your faithfulness depends on things, gifts, blessings or feelings, when the devil strikes (and he will strike) you shall backslide. Some backsliders stop going to church. Some continue to attend services at some worldly church but internally they backslide; their heart and mind is the same as of any unbeliever. They habitually lust sexually, covet material things, lie, become over ambitious and proud.

What the is the solution? The secret is to start with Jesus, continue with Jesus and end up with Jesus! Come to Jesus, take up your cross daily and follow Jesus! Fight the good fight of faith! Be jealous over your testimony as a faithful child and servant of God! There is a crown at the end! Guard your heart because it is the spring of the water of life to many! Rejoice always that you are a child of God! Boast about it! Hate sin and ever appearance of sin! Stay pure! Stay holy! Stay hot! Pray! Let the fire of passion for Jesus consume any other idol in your heart! Be true to God, to the Word of God and to yourself! Hate deception and hypocrisy! Aggressively engage in spiritual warfare and do exploits for the King of kings! Be among the best ‘in the class’! Do not stay behind, in the shadow of the world! Worship The Lord! Be filled and stay filled with the Holy Spirit! You can do it! Let all men be liars, God is forever true! To God be all the glory!

‘I have decided to follow Jesus! I have decided to follow Jesus!
No turning back, no turning back!
The world behind me, the Cross before me
No turning back, no turning back!’

“Let your fountain be blessed and enjoy the wife of your youth…Enjoy life with the wife you love…” (PV 5:18; Ecc 9:9)

A relationship is defined as a state of connection between people; an emotional attachment between individuals. An interpersonal relationship is a strong and deep friendly connection between two or more people.  It may range in duration from brief to enduring. It is based on love, family or social commitment, association at the place of work or fellowship in the church. These may be regulated by tradition, specific laws, mutual agreement, prayers or promises made to each other.

We shall now discuss the relationship between Christians and specifically in the marriage. God invented the institution of marriage. God alone has the key to a successful marriage. He gives that secret key to them who are born again and who want to know His ways in all things, including their married life. Because we are born sinners, it is very easy to take love or marriage for granted. To take for granted it means to accept or to use something or someone in a careless manner. In marriage, it means to live together, have children but without true love for one another and without giving glory to God. This is a sad but very common reality even in the Christian homes.

Human beings are created to love God and to love others. God invented marriage so that love can have a place to grow so that He can bless it. True love means to intimately know each other. This intimacy requires mature spiritual and emotional stability. Each partner needs to know himself and the other. Marriage is a deep full time work of love. A lazy man will make a bad husband. A selfish woman will make a bad wife. The fear of intimacy is poison to satisfaction in marriage.  It leads to loneliness and depression even while married. In this way marriage has lost its godly purpose.

Marriage, love, friendship is not easy. There are many snares to avoid, many tests to pass. In the process of knowing one another, we fall into many temptations. Sacrificial love is risky because sin still dwells in the flesh. We dream big but we invest too little for our dreams to come true. Most lovers get disappointed in life. A relationship can be wounded superficially or very deeply. Hurts received in marriage are very painful. The wounds of betrayal, even with prayers and patience, are slow to heal. It is easy to give up and decided to be ‘on your own’. Many married couples have divorced spiritually or emotionally but they still live together. They sleep in the same bed and take care of their children. But their love got sick and died.  You should know that the devil hates Christian marriages. He will fight with all his strength to destroy your home. Pray for yourself and for your spouse. Pray also for the marriage itself, for that invisible cord of the Holy Spirit between the two of you. Marriage is to be enjoyed in the presence of God. Like wine, marriage should mature with time, in the presence of God.

OUR TESTIMONY

My husband and I we are very different in the natural. He is ‘black’ and I am ‘white’. We are from different continents and cultures. We like different types of food and different styles of fashion. We have different natural and spiritual gifts. We have different strategies of solving the challenges of life. But the unity of the Spirit is established between us! In Christ, we are one! We are married for 42 years. Not just married, but happily so. Our marriage is a challenge, an inspiration and a blessing to many. It is also a ministry that gives glory to God. Both of us have learned over the years to be spiritual, humble, grateful, hardworking, wise, strong, faithful, gentle and loving with one another. These are the fruits of the Holy Spirit working in us. We have learned to allow the Holy Spirit to be free in our lives, to change us into the image of Jesus. The secret of the success of our marriage and ministry is the Person of God the Holy Spirit. That is our secret!!! To God be all the glory!

“An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city.
Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars” (PV 18:19)
In Hebrew it means that if your true friend betrays you, the friendship is mortally wounded. Love becomes like a beggar, a fugitive on the streets of unfulfilled dreams. The broken heart will look for the home where it grew up but now, the gate is closed, the password forgotten. The split, the divorce will grow to become a monster, bold and loud, rude and wicked, too hard for mercy to conquer. A once close friend, when injured or deceived, becomes a potent and irreconcilable enemy. These are some sayings from wise men of old: ‘bitter are the quarrels of friends; those who love beyond measure will also hate beyond measure; deep friendship once injured is forever lost’. Jesus said this: ‘Woe to the world because of offences! For offences must come but woe to that man by whom the offense comes’ He said that it is better to cut off hand or foot and even pluck your eye than to offend, to injure, to betray ‘a little’ child of God (Mt 18:6-9).

Do not take your marriage for granted. Be very careful to avoid quarrels which cause division. Be sensitive when you sense that ‘the devil is in the room and the quarrel is coming’. The Holy Spirit will prepare your heart to sense that you need to keep quiet and still. Communication is like playing table tennis. Each partner feels like responding to the words of the other. Be careful: if the tone of voice becomes too high, the tendency to argue increases. Show self-restrain. Both love and self-control are fruits of the Holy Spirit. Talking is like driving a car. It is exciting to drive it full speed. It is fun to defend your opinions. But look at the Holy Ghost ‘traffic signs’. Keep below the speed limit. Learn to use your breaks. From time to time check your spiritual brakes, if the pads of patience are still functioning well and the oil of wisdom still intact. Quarrels between close friends, between husband and wife can end in disaster. You can wreck your marriage and it may not be possible to repair it on earth. Behave and speak in such a way that tomorrow, you do not need to apologize for your actions and words of today.

Child of God, when things are hard, when tears freely flow and nothing is able to stop them, when you make mistakes, when you are misunderstood, when friends fail and family withdraws… then remember that God is always faithful! “Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever!” (Heb 13: 8). He was betrayed by sinners but loved to the end. Crawl into His loving arms and find peace. You may not need to know all the answers. You may not need to have all the deep revelations of conflict because God knows them all. He knows your heart. He knows that you love Him. He knows your weakness and strength. He knows each word even before it comes on your tongue. He loves you with an everlasting love. You are secure in knowing Jesus, your Savior, King and Best Friend. He died for you. He forgives you. He is still with you. Inside your heart, no matter what, you can rejoice always! Love is not easy. But love is still the best gift of God. Be jealous over it! Cherish it! Give thanks!

Today we are very happy! We have entered this building in October 2015. Since then we only use Generators to have electricity, both in the church and in our apartment. NEPA is the Government official agency that supplies electricity in Nigeria. It is very expensive to buy diesel. We have applied to NEPA since then. We filled all their forms and obeyed all their instructions. But they always had so many excuses… We did all things we knew…we begged, we got upset and we prayed on and on… Finally, today, we have NEPA!!! I can say that this trial forced us to learn how be patient! God makes all things beautiful in His time! This is God’s time! For us, this is a miracle. That is why we say: to God be all the glory!

 
“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Rom 8:1)
How does guilt come? When we see another person suffering, it causes us pain. It leads to us thinking that we should do something to relieve the suffering of others. If we cannot help another or if we fail in our efforts, we experience feelings of guilt. The criminals have no sense of guilt. We try to over-compensate that and start feeling guilty so that we are not tagged as criminals. Guilt is an emotional experience that occurs when a person believes—accurately or not—that he has compromised his own standards of conduct and bears significant responsibility for that violation. Guilt can be a good feeling for it helps us repent of sin. But guilt can also become a terrible burden that affects the whole life. There is something called ‘the disease of false guilt’. At the root of false guilt is the idea that what you feel must be true. In other words, if you feel guilty, you must be guilty! Feelings, emotions become the king of the soul. Guilt is never single. Anxiety is the wife of guilt. They always walk together. Their children are called depression and inferiority complex.

Feeling guilty is an unpleasant experience. The person tries to avoid guilt in four ways:
*Repression- he hides denies or ignores the negative experience but the guilt resurfaces later.
*Projection- the guilty man blames the victim or other people. For example, children blame the parents for not given them the best in life. This attitude adds false burden upon others and the guilt lives on.
*Sharing in the feelings of guilt is another method widely practiced. They borrow their guilt to others who are willing to take their burden. This is common between husband and wife.
*Self-punishment- others end up punishing themselves for the crime they have committed (or imagined that they did it). They decide ‘not to enjoy life’. Living like a beggar is often the result of uncompensated guilt feelings

Spiritually speaking, the only place to find freedom from sin and guilt is at the Cross of Christ. Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved! The devil will attack you with false guilt placing burdens that do not belong to you. This creates a life of bondage. You get addicted to your burden that was not yours in the first place. If you even imagine deliverance the devil comes and tells you that you are selfish for desiring freedom, for wishing that you can enjoy life. The vicious circle of bondage goes on. You need to go back to the Bible and believe the Word of God. Jesus died to save your soul! Jesus died to pay for your sin. His Blood was shed so that you are free from the power and guilt of sin! Doubt in the promise of God will keep you in bondage and make your life miserable.

Let’s pray: ‘Dear Heavenly Father, have mercy on us! Forgive us for the sin of doubt. I now command these demons of doubt, depression, religion, anxiety and false guilt to go away, in the name of Jesus! I destroy every occult covenant made against your soul! Stop apologizing to the devil! Stop punishing yourself! Jesus Christ made you ‘free indeed’! Believe the Promise of God! You are free! Enjoy your life and your salvation! In Jesus name, amen!”

In Christ I declare:
I am a child of God!
Jesus took away my guilt and shame!
There is no condemnation for me!
I am free indeed!
In Jesus name, amen!

“Behold! My Servant whom I uphold,

My Elect One in whom My soul delights!

I have put My Spirit upon Him;

He will bring forth justice to the Gentiles.

He will not cry out, nor raise His voice,

Nor cause His voice to be heard in the street.

A bruised reed He will not break,

And smoking flax He will not quench;

He will bring forth justice for truth.

He will not fail nor be discouraged,

Till He has established justice in the earth;

And the coastlands shall wait for His law” (Is 42:1-4)

On the Cross Jesus cried: It is finished! The grace of God given to us is rooted in the finished work of Christ! This is the revelation of the Word: After the Cross God does not require any other sacrifice. The sacrifice of Jesus is supreme! It is enough! The Father is satisfied!

The second revelation is this: God can never fail! Jesus did not come to earth hoping to win! He was the Elect One, the Servant of God who was destined to win! Jesus can never fail or be disappointed! In Hebrew the word ‘fail’ means to be low in spirit, to lose strength, to stop functioning normally, to be unsuccessful, to be bankrupt, to disappoint self, to faint, to be hopeless, dull or depressed because of  somebody’s rebuke. To be ‘discouraged’ it means to lack courage and confidence, to stop doing something, to break in pieces because of wicked oppression.  Jesus can never be described like this. Even the child of God who is filled with the Holy Spirit cannot be described like this. No matter what the devil did to Him, Jesus fulfilled the plan and the purpose of God to save sinners like me and you! Jesus is not trying to bring justice: Jesus has established Justice! He is the Judge of all! He is confident, strong and self-sufficient because He is God!  The hope of the world is not a dictator or somebody like Donald Trump! The hope of the world is a Servant!  Jesus is Truth! He will persevere unto victory for the truth! Truth must win! On the Cross truth died but on the third day, truth rose from the grave! Truth can never die again! Let every man be a liar, God will forever be true!

As a Teacher, He is delightful, patient and gentle!  To Jesus, nobody is useless, nobody is hopeless! He can deal with weak people without destroying them! He can surely deal with you and your problems without breaking you! Your hope is Jesus, the Lion and the Lamb! Your hope is Jesus, the Eternal Servant King! Christ in you is the Hope of Glory! That is why your future is better than your past! Be confident of your faith: You worship a God that can never fail! In Christ, you too can never fail! Halleluiah!

In Christ I declare:

I am a child of God!

My God can never fail!

I can never fail!

All things work together for my good!

This is my portion, my song and my testimony!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Until the day breaks

And the shadows flee away,

Turn, my beloved,

And be like a gazelle

Or a young stag

Upon the mountains of Bether” (SS 2:17)

This is the voice of the Bridegroom to His bride. Jesus tells His Church: ‘Turn my Beloved…” In Hebrew the word ‘turn’ means to walk by Me; to sit down with Me; when in danger quickly return back to Me. This is a call to close intimate fellowship with Jesus.  This is a walk of faith and not of sight. This is a safe, pure and romantic travel. This holy exercise shall be in the night, before the ‘day breaks’. Jesus is the Light of the world. If you follow Him you shall never stumble. It is in darkness that your faith is trained. The day brings distractions that may hinder your walk with Jesus. This walk is upon the mountains of Bether.  This word means ‘separation’. You need to walk with Jesus and forget the world. He is jealous for you. Divorce the world! On this holy mountain of separation unto Your Lover, your eye shall be single and your heart shall be united with His own! He is so beautiful that I promise: you shall not miss the world. There shall be no more shadows and no more lies. The Shekinah glory of the Holy One shall be all the light you need. The pillar of fire by night shall lead the way and bring you to the Promised Land of Destiny!

Jesus compares you with a gazelle. These are thin, graceful antelopes that live in Africa and Asia. They are very beautiful animals. Men hunt them as trophies. They live in herds and are highly social. Their diet of grass and leaves keeps them constantly grazing and they have little need for water, being able to extract moisture from their food. They have many enemies like the cheetahs and the wild dogs. They are exceptionally alert and rely heavily upon their impressive senses of hearing, sight and smell to detect any threat. They run very fast with speeds of almost 100 Km per hour. From time to time, when running, gazelles leap, springing high into the air with all four feet to distract the enemy. These jumps intimidate the enemies and they stop pursuing them.

Spiritually, you are like the gazelle. Jesus sees you beautiful. You should see yourself the way Jesus sees you. He says that you are beautiful! Believe Him! You need to be alert and watchful. There are many enemies. If in danger, you need to flee from sin, turn back and run to Jesus! You need to jump in the air proving the power of resurrection. This is the dance of eternal life. You need to learn its steps! The enemies will get tired to follow you and go back. You need to stay close to Jesus and to one another.

Can you hear your Lover’s voice of concern? Can you feel His jealousy? Can you touch His heart of love? Jesus loves you more than you shall ever know! This night, leave the valley of sin and death and climb the mountain of Bether called Zion. May you have a fresh revelation of God’s love for you! Be like a gazelle!

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