“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear” (1Pet 3:1-6)

We all desire to be women of God. Here we are given Sarah as an example of a ‘holy woman of the past’. But the Bible is not just a history book. It is the ever living Word of God, a present help in times of need. By the grace of God, we shall study how to become ‘holy women of the present!’

*The wife’s character is the strongest weapon in his conversion and the happiness of the marriage!

The strongest weapon in home evangelism is the character of the wife. The husband does not listen but the husband sees! Please remember: your husband may be deaf but he is not blind! He ‘sees the purity and the reverence’ of his wife.  In Greek the word ‘sees’ it means to inspect and thoroughly watch. Did you know that you are ‘an actress’ and your husband comes to see you perform? Why not play the role so well that you may win the trophy? Did you know that your husband is your constant inspector? He is designed by God to examine you and to find fault with you, especially with your words and daily behavior.

*The husband is an inspector and sees all faults

The husband will not be impressed with your lace, or head tie. But two things will touch his heart and will drive the demons far from him: your purity and your reverence. A woman of God is filled with the Holy Spirit who cleanses her soul. She becomes holy, clean and child- like. She is not foolish, but holy and spiritually innocent, free from condemnation, pride and bitter guilt. She does not use evil manipulations or crooked strategies in her marriage or other relationships. She fears God too much to lie, to deceive or to cheat others. The world says the opposite. The wayward wife deceives her husband and others to gain some imaginary rewards. Even if you think you can hide your evil plans from others, you cannot hide them from at least two persons: God and your husband! That is how God made marriage to be!  “Your desire shall be for your husband and he will rule over you!” (Gen 3:16) Dear single sisters, for as long as you refuse to repent or all evil behavior and seducing strategies, you will never marry a believer. Do not invest in fashion design but in a holy character that pleases men, angels and even God!

Let me add this: My parents were teachers. I still remember their preparation and anxiety when the state inspector came to the school. That event was not often but when the inspection day came, it was terrible for all. Just imagine that you have to live with that inspector every day. Every word you say, to him and to others, is observed and analyzed. The way you behave with your relatives and your in- laws, he marks them in his heart. Every meal you cook and every choice you make all these are recorded and publicly declared. If you try to bribe him, he will see it. If you try to seduce him, he will notice it. By now, maybe you are scared to even marry. No need to fear but be sure to marry a believer! This is to avoid much sorrow from an inspector who is more of a trouble maker than a friend. This is the way God made it to be. Selah!

*There is an acceptable dress code for a woman of God

Almost all believers know that there is ‘a dress code’ acceptable to God and man. But for many, it is just a theory. Very few women have the wisdom to apply such knowledge into practice. This is the truth: it is not easy to dress well as a woman of God. It is not just a matter of ‘fashion sense’, culture, money or ‘body type’. If the Bible did not say anything about it, we should have used only our common sense and dress as we like. But the Word of God tells us some things about this topic, enough for us to pause, pray and plan ahead. Like soldiers have their own uniforms, like the nurses have theirs, so the Christian woman should dress to represent her Lord. As a woman of God, you are a total ‘package’ presented by the Holy Spirit. It is said that you should not judge a book by its cover. This is true, but not always. Some ‘covers’ are so ugly, that it is hard to sell that book. As women, in almost every meeting we’ve touched this subject. But as we pray for revival and new revelations come, we shall continue to give attention to the Word of God concerning this mostly misunderstood, but important practical subject.

It is not enough to do something good. God looks at the motives of that action. Why do you do what you do? Who do you want to please: God or man? If you want to please man, God will withdraw from your life. But if you want to please God, he will make even your enemies to be at peace with you! That peace that passes all understanding is the strength of my confidence and the anchor of my soul.

In Christ I declare:

I am a holy woman of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear” (1Pet 3:1-6)

We all desire to be women of God. Here we are given Sarah as an example of a ‘holy woman of the past’. But the Bible is not just a history book. It is the ever living Word of God, a present help in times of need. By the grace of God, we shall study how to become ‘holy women of the present!’

One of the most difficult commands to obey is this: ‘Wives submit to your own husbands as unto the Lord!’ Submission is one of the laws of the Kingdom of God. This submission is not forced. It is the wife’s free choice done for the sake of Christ who, as a man, submitted Himself to God the Father. It is also done for the sake of the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Finally, the submission is done for the common good of the family. Please observe that the wives do not submit to all men. This command means submission only to their husbands and it is done ‘as unto the Lord’. It is easier for a believing wife to submit to her Christian husband. This is because he loves her as Christ loves the church. But it is extremely difficult to submit to an unbelieving husband. The believing wife is not exempted just because her husband is not saved. Rebellion and pride are sins. Her submission is expected even in this difficult situation. The question is this: As wives, how do we submit ‘successfully’?

*Sometimes, silence is louder than words!

First of all, the wife has to be truly born again. She knows that only God can change her husband’s heart. She does not try to manipulate his will, for that is called witchcraft. She will build herself in the most holy faith by the Word of God and by prayer. Except he specifically requests to hear the word of God, she may not preach to him! Let him go to church and listen to the pastor! Preaching to such a man at home will only add fuel to his stubbornness. She has to learn to control her tongue! Submission means that she will humble herself, go down to his level and discuss with him only ‘natural’ things. She will ask him about his job, his health and the children. If he does not ask for prayer, she may not volunteer to pray aloud. This spiritual quietness is a weapon that the Holy Spirit uses to break the stubborn will of the man. ‘Wife, always be led by the Holy Spirit!’

*In spiritual warfare, fashion is a useless and deceptive weapon!

The wife cannot impress him with anything in the natural. Her good sense of fashion, her beautiful dresses and hair styles, none of these are useful to touch her husband’s spirit. Even if he compliments her for the dresses she wears, there is no lasting spiritual gain coming from such a compliment. Here we see the weakness of fashion. It is more a form of entertainment with no eternal value at all. Once you understand this, you will not be frustrated when your husband does not notice your new dress or your latest hair style. This wisdom is the opposite of what is called common sense. The wisdom of the world says that the more fashionable you are, the stronger your marriage will be. But that is a lie. It took me many years and many prayers to finally believe this revelation. I am not saying that you should dress carelessly. But if you dress beautifully, let it be for the glory of God and not only for the pleasure of your husband.

In Christ I declare:

My marriage is successful!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Then the Lord said to me: “Go again, love a woman who is loved by a lover and is committing adultery, just like the love of the Lord for the children of Israel, who look to other gods and love the raisin cakes of the pagans” (Hos 3:1)

“When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her: “Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?”

She said, “No one, Lord.”

And Jesus said to her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.”

Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.” (Jn 8:8-12)

Recently a young woman of about twenty five came to my office. She was accompanied by an older sister from the church. The young woman got married last December to a brother who attends our Father’s House. Their wedding ceremony was done in her church. This is her story: Last month her husband’s sisters caught her phoning another man. This created a big family quarrel. The husband confronted her but she refused to confess to adultery. Then the in laws drove her away to her parents’ house. Over there, she admitted that she had sex with another man while in her husband’s house.

Understandably, the husband was very hurt and angry. He decided that, for now, her punishment was to stay in her parents’ house for the next three months. Then he will know what to do. Her father asked him for mercy. That at least, let the husband send some of her clothes so that she can change. The husband said no. Her family is poor. His family is putting pressure on him to divorce her.

When the young woman came to my office she was scared to death. She looked like an animal in the bush, caught in the snare of the hunter. She could not look at my face. She was talking fast, in whispers, clearly ashamed. Her dress was not cheap; it surely looked good once upon a time. But now, it was dirty with oil and it smelled sweat.

She agreed that she had sex four times with a stranger. She said that the man met her on the road and that she foolishly followed him. She does not know the name of the man. They went to a hotel, but she does not remember the address of the place. I asked her why she did it. Her only answer was “Temptation, ma…Temptation, ma…”

I asked her if she still loves her husband and if she wants to go back to him. She said yes. I asked her if she is pregnant. She said no. I asked her if the man gave her money for sex. She said no. I repeated the question three times. She said no. Then I asked if the stranger promised her to give money later. She quietly said yes. She said that she had hoped that the man will help her with money. She wants a hair dresser shop. She plaits hair for a living.

(I could not believe that she attends our church but this was the reality I could not deny)

As firmly and gently as I could, I told her the reason why she committed adultery is not because she is poor, not because her husband is poor, but because she is not born again. This temptation she was talking about was an occult spell. The stranger succeeded only because she is not a child of God. I told her that I understand she wants her marriage back. But for now, she has to let go of that wish and simply come to the Cross of Christ. I told her he is just a religious woman but not saved; her soul is more important than even her marriage. She has to love Jesus more than any man. She should use this pain and shame to make peace with God. Today is her day of salvation!

She listened! She agreed to do so. I prayed with her that God will have mercy on a lost soul and reveal to her the way to eternal life. I could see that she was hanging on any little word of hope from my lips. And Christ, the hope of glory was the best I could offer. I sis not confused her with other little promises. She took Jesus Christ by faith. I then asked the older sister to tell the hurting husband to come and see me as soon as he can. I could not promise that I can change the husband’s heart, but I said I will try to intercede for her.

The next day, he was there waiting. This is the first time that we spoke face to face. He was angry and hurt. I allowed him to tell me the story all over again. He said that he suspected something was wrong when she will run to the toilet to answer phone calls. I prayed for wisdom. It is not easy to handle a hurting man. The devil got him strong. Again, my only hope was Jesus Christ, ‘the Friend of sinners’.

For as long as he focused on his ‘righteous’ hurt we could not move forward. Then I asked him: ‘How did you meet your wife? Did you sleep with her before the wedding?’ To my surprise, these ‘simple’ questions became swords. Suddenly, he started weeping ‘like a woman’. It is not easy to witness the wailing cry of a man. I quietly prayed in the spirit waiting for the flood of emotions to calm down. He then said in ‘Pidgin’ English: ‘Pastor, I was a road side mechanic. I was a rough man. I did not know God. I told my mates that one day I will go to that church with big sign board, Father’s House. They laughed at me for all of us were rough boys. Then eleven years ago I came to this church. I really gave my life to Christ. I had a girl friend at that time. I told her that I am saved and I don’t want sex again. She too laughed and tempted me three times. I did not look at her face. She got tired of me and left. Since then, I kept myself. I tried to marry from the church but the three sisters I proposed rejected me. They said that I am not ‘fain’ enough for them. My family wanted to bring a girl from the village that I should marry but I rejected the offer. That is when I met my wife and she agreed to marry me. It is true; we had sex together before the wedding. We did not tell anyone… No one knows but God…’

The tears and his humble confession opened a door of faith for me. It is true that I have seen this man in the church. He is not what you call a handsome man. He always looked in a hurry. He rarely attended weekly activities. He was not involved in any ministry. He was a loner. He always looked worried or sad. I never saw him smiling. From distance, I could not tell if he was saved or not. But that afternoon in my office, the tears washed away the lies and the truth came to light. This unfriendly unattractive lonely sad man was indeed a true son of the Most High God. What a wonderful revelation! Wrapped in a cloak of darkness and foolishness, covered with the dirt of hurt from an unbelieving woman he found in a strange far country, rejected and broken hearted, the prodigal son finally came home…Halleluiah, the angels are singing…

I asked him: do you still love your wife? He said yes. But that his family is forcing him to send her away… I then spoke with confidence: “Dear brother in Christ, you are a man of God! You are royal priest hood in Christ! Today you have to choose between the will of God and your family council. Adopt the culture of heaven! Before you are an urhobo man, you are a child of God! We shall pray that God will grant a new beginning to you, to your wife and to your marriage. As the sickness of Lazarus was not unto death, so your sin will not be unto divorce, but that the Son of God will be revealed in all His glory! I have faith and hope for you! This hope is Jesus Christ who died to set us free! The God who saved me has spoken! In Him, there is hope for the hopeless! Have faith! Be of good courage! The devil has lost this battle. See the light at the end of the tunnel of shame! Jesus is Lord! Just believe!”

He said Amen!

In Christ I declare:

This brother and his wife are saved!

Marriage is a good thing!

Marriage is a gift from God and nobody can steal it!

The devil is a liar and a loser!

Their marriage shall be restored!

All to the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” (1Pet 3:7)

The following are some medical facts about the difference between the male and female brain. Doctors still argue about these findings and research is going on. But this is the truth: men and women think in different ways; they have different strategies in dealing with challenges of life in general and marriage in particular. The way their brain is ‘wired’ is different. This scientific information applies to the natural man. A child of God changes under the influence of the Holy Spirit. He develops the mind of Christ, which is the ideal human way of thinking. In Christ there is no male or female. Also, we should remember that each human being is unique and cannot be put in a box. That is why the following facts are to be viewed just as general guidelines.

The male brain works in such a way that men focus on one task at a time. They persevere to the end in that one project without getting tired or bored. They are able to reject all distractions until they succeed. Men think faster and are less emotional. Men are able to separate their thinking in different compartments without mixing them together. For example a man can cheat in the office and go home and be romantic to his wife without feeling guilty about his illegal activity in the morning. The level of testosterone (the male hormone) is at least ten times higher than in the women’s blood. That makes men more ‘sexy’ and more aggressive. They are led by what they see. For a man blindness is worse than death. They are physically stronger and desire to be in charge. They like to compete and win.

The women like to do more things in the same time. They tend to link everything together. They get easily bored with doing only one thing. They are more distracted by other factors and have more difficulty in staying focused. Because of this weakness, they start many things but finish few. Women are more emotional. They weep easier.

Women like to mix things, to connect information and see the bigger picture. They also value relationships. If a woman is offended in the morning, it will take her much longer to recover. For women, sex is not just ‘a thing’. They need a story, an atmosphere, a feeling of love. They are more emotional than men. They give up a battle easier and readily start new things. Women like to feel thins deeper than men. They are lead less by what they see and more by feelings or by a combination of factors.

These facts are just to remind ourselves that there are differences between the natural men and women. To the men, the women seem slow, foolish, forgetful and not practical enough to cope with the stress of life. For example, most men I counsel in my office do not trust their wives financially. They refuse to trust their advice when it comes to financial investment. A husband can give his wife money for house allowance and even generous gifts but he does not trust her as a business partner. He doesn’t want ‘to bother her’ with making money. That is a common explanation I hear from the married men.

The women’s weakness the Bible talks about is not spiritual. For in Christ there is no difference between male and female. If they are saved, both the husband and the wife are co-heirs with Christ. There is no male Holy Spirit or female Holy Spirit. But the weakness is physical and it comes from the way God created the female body. The husbands are commanded to be considerate with their wives, to understand the way God created them.

A wife is a helper to her husband. That is God’s decree for marriage. A helper is someone who aids another at his point of weakness, to make him stronger. A good wife knows the weakness of her husband and gives the right support, at the right time and at that particular point. This support is mostly spiritual, thru prayer and counsel. The godly wife prays to find the weakness of her husband and after that she prays more for strength to be supplied at that point of need. She encourages him to fulfill his destiny as a man of God. But marriage is not just ‘one way traffic’. The husband too has to identify the weakness of his wife. He should not insult or mock her for being weak. He should not desire to change her to be like him. A woman can never be a man. He needs to love her with her weakness, like Christ loves the church and to be considerate with her.

To be considerate it means to be kind; to think and feel the feelings of another. Because we are so selfish, it is not easy to practice godly consideration. The husband is to be careful not to hurt his wife thru ignorance or negligence. Any hurt in marriage is very difficult to heal.  To be considerate means to be accommodating, patient, mature and flexible with her until she finds her needed strength from God along the way. A wife values her husband’s godly consideration very much and finds it to be very attractive.

There is a famous movie called ‘My fair Lady’. A middle aged bachelor man tried to change a poor ‘ghetto’ girl into a princess. He changed her accent and thought her the good manners of high society. It was not easy for the girl to change. But because she started loving him she cooperated with his impossible demands. He often complains that she is too weak and foolish ‘just like a woman’. He says: ‘Why is the woman not made like a man?’ Finally she was ready. Dressed beautifully she goes to the queen’s ball and nobody knows that she was once just a street girl. The experiment was very successful. He now wants to dispose of her, sending her back to the streets from where she came from. He could not believe that she loves him. He will hurt her with wicked words and when she weeps, he is surprised at her tears. He does not understand her at all. All this time he looked at her as an object without a soul, who cannot have any feelings. This is how the unbelieving men think about women. Then a miracle happens and, for the first time he sees her heart. He now becomes considerate, free to love her, to appreciate her weakness and all.

This is our testimony:

My husband and I we are very different in many things. But the unity of the Spirit is strong in our marriage. The grace of God manifest in this: where I am weak, my husband is strong. And where he is weak, I am strong. In this way we can ‘balance’ our spiritual and emotional resources to make great progress with very little effort. We do not compete but we compliment. Over the years God has helped us that together, thru wisdom and love we are much stronger. ‘We put to flight ten thousand’. Our marriage works as a perfect heavenly designed machine oiled by the Holy Spirit. To the glory of God, for many years we have not been in a situation where both of us are weak in the same time and concerning the same matter. That could have been terrible and a great shame. One’s mistake became the platform for the other’s victory. And then, with tears of joy in our eyes, the shout of the King in our mouths and holding hands, we share in the trophy together! This is the secret of the un-interrupted flow of prayer and praise in our home! This is the reason why the heavens remain open over our marriage! All glory to God! Be encouraged for God is the Master of the game called ‘success in life’!

In Christ I declare:

My marriage is successful!

As for me and my house, we shall serve the Lord!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“There are sixty queens

And eighty concubines,

And virgins without number…

My dove, my perfect one,

Is the only one”

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband”

(SS 6:8, 9; Eph 5:31-33)

It is believed that civilization came in through the influence of the ancient cultures, the two main ones being Greek and Roman. The Roman law is still the basis for the constitution of many countries today. I gathered the following information about the life of women in the Roman Empire, especially before Christianity spread in Rome and beyond. Read and mediate on these words:

A Roman household was considered a collective body over which the father was the leader.  Slaves, who had no legal standing, were part of the household only as property. The legal standing of daughters differs little from that of sons. If the father died without a will, the right of a daughter to share in the family property was equal to that of a son. The father had the right and duty to find a husband for his daughter. That is why first marriages were normally arranged. Technically, the couple had to be old enough to consent (12 for girls and 14 for boys).

After marriage the husband and his wife kept their properties separate. The bride became subject to her husband, but to a lesser degree than their children. But a daughter’s legal relationship to her father remained unchanged even though she moved into her husband’s home. A daughter was expected to submit and honor her father all his life, even if she had to disobey her husband. As a married woman, she kept her own family name for life, not assuming that of her husband. This arrangement explained the degree of independence Roman married women enjoyed relative to those of other ancient cultures. Although she had to answer to her father legally, she didn’t live her daily life under his direct scrutiny and her husband had no legal power over her. To be a good daughter was esteemed to be better than to be a good wife! The testimony of the father was greater than that of any husband.

We see that in the Roman Empire marriage was not a strong institution. The familiar spirits were in charge, to guide men and women all their lives. The children’s submission to their father was always a priority. Because of the strong ties to their families, the young couple was not able to truly cleave to each other as the Bible demands it. That is why Apostle Paul commanded the Christian wives to be different than their culture; to submit to their own husbands and not to their fathers. It does not mean that the young people will abandon their parents but they have to change their priorities. The marriage was now more important than the father’s house. The testimony of the husband is now greater than that of the natural father or any other man.

In Greek, the word ‘leave’ means to forsake, to let go. Something that was useful in the present becomes now a thing of the past. Something that was a priority is now ‘demoted’ into the second place. The word ‘cleave’ means to glue two parts together so that they become one new object with a different function. This ‘leaving and cleaving’ is a mystery, a deep spiritual secret. God alone knows who is to cleave. No man knows his life partner without prayer and direct personal revelation from God. Just the way you cannot glue together wood and metal, or plastic and paper, so also the Holy Spirit cannot seal an unequally yoked relationship. Any man or woman who is self-confident and boasting of his choice of a life partner, without asking God, that man is a fool. For God made marriage to be a mystery and only Him has the key to open it.

The wife submits to her own husband as a sign that she fears God. This submission cannot be demanded; it cannot be taken by arguments of force. The submission of the wife is her gift to her husband, in the name of the Lord!

The husband is to love his wife ‘in particular’. The word means to see her special even if she is in the crowd, to be attentive to all the details of her needs, to understand how her body and her spirit works, to be careful to avoid mistakes and hurt her; to desire her best and the fulfillment of her destiny.

Let me be more personal: When my husband and I we got married, we were both unbelievers. We did not pray. We did not go to church. Looking back, after forty years of marriage, I thank God for His mercy, His love and wisdom to us. We are now both saved and in full time ministry. I am now free to apply the principles of the Bible. I submit to my husband and I honor him for no other human reason except that I fear God. This is the truth: I fear God; I hate grieving His Spirit; I desire to please Him in all things even in my marriage. This element is new in my life. Before I got saved, I used to submit to my husband but only because he liked that attitude and it made him happy. But now it is different. All things must be done respecting God’s presence in our midst, as a form of worship and for His glory alone. In the past my husband used to tell others: ‘My wife is very good to me’. Each time he said that I was very happy. But now, he says much more than that: “My wife is a woman of God indeed!” My husband loves me as Christ loves the church. I feel secure in his love for me. My husband loves me ‘in particular’. He is attentive to my needs and he makes every moment of our marriage special and unforgettable. This is my testimony freely spoken to the glory of God!

In Christ I declare:

I left my natural parents to marry my husband (wife)!

I do not submit to anyone as I submit to my husband!

I do all things as unto the Lord!

My testimony is increasing!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them” (Col 3:19)

In Greek, the word ‘harsh’ means to be bitter, sharp, like a nail piercing the soul. It means to be rough and unpleasant to touch, ugly, selfish, rude, unromantic, thoughtless, difficult to understand, stingy, stubborn and troublesome. Such a man makes impossible demands that stretch his wife’s patience to the limit. Another way to describe such a man is this: He likes to ‘rain on somebody’s parade’. In other words, he takes pleasure to spoil the plans and the pleasure of his wife. The best example in the Bible is Nabal, the husband of Abigail. He was ‘a man harsh and evil in his doings” (1Sam 25:3)

Like Abigail, the wife needs great courage, wisdom and sacrificial love to submit to such a man. She needs to be born again and Spirit filled to succeed in such a difficult marriage. What is impossible with men it is possible with God!

Let’s remind ourselves of the truth: Marriage is God’s gift to men. But it takes a lot of work to make it successful. Often it is a struggle and the home appears to be a battle field. There are many reasons why it is so hard, especially at the beginning. The husband and the wife, each comes from different backgrounds, each has different expectations. There is also the spiritual element. The devil hates marriages for they symbolize the union and the love between Christ and the church. To have a successful marriage is great achievement. If your Christianity does not work at home, then it is fake! The husband needs to learn to love his wife. This is not an easy thing. This love has a particular pattern, to be approved by God. It is the agape sacrificial love that Christ demonstrated on earth, especially on the Cross. It is said that Eros, the sexual love says: “I take and I take!” Phileo, the friendly love says ‘I give and I take!” But Agape love simply says: “I Give and I Give” even unto death!

A harsh husband will frustrate and provoke his wife until she collapses on the floor. He only wants to take and take. She has to give and give. Without the Spirit of God working in the wife, the marriage will surely end. I know women who suffer horrors in their homes. They do everything to make their husband happy but the men remain ungrateful to the end. They treat their wives as slaves, totally careless of their feelings. They order like soldiers, from morning until night. If the women are Christians, they endure the hardship knowing that God hates divorce. I am not talking about the harems of polygamous men. I am talking about church folks who from distance look successful and happy. But the truth is different at home. I do not respect any man who constantly makes his wife cry or who mocks her in public.

This is our testimony:

My husband and I, we decided from the beginning of our marriage, that we should never argue, mock or insult one another in public. When I say ‘public’ that means anywhere outside our bedroom. Our children have never seen us arguing. My in laws or my parents have never seen us mocking or insulting one another. Never! Even if I make a mistake, my husband will not correct me openly, if there is any other person around. The same thing with me! Whatever the situation, late at night, alone in the bedroom, we sit down and discuss our mistakes, apologize, forgive one another and learn from it all. We give each other a lot of ‘credit’. For example, if I make any ‘social mistake’ my husband will think like this: ‘it is not her fault. She is a foreigner. I have to teach her what to do in the future…’ If he makes mistakes, then I find myself thinking: ‘He is tired from work, too many people phone him asking for help; he too is human…’ This is love, not to be easily provoked, to have in mind that no one is perfect and that we must all answer to God for every word we speak and for every action we take. Under provocation, I just shut down. There is no need to quarrel, no matter the situation. A servant of God does not quarrel. Period! Long ago, by faith in Christ, I have been delivered from the demon of quarrel and I am now free! Quarrels can only add reasons for regret and fuel to crisis. No matter the provocation, I refuse to lose my temper! I chose to hold on to my peace! I take the chance to be seen as a fool. That is much better than to increase my voice and become red with anger. It is not worth it! My testimony as a woman of God is too precious to me to lose it for a minute of foolish arguments. I always look ahead and not just at the present. My future is dear to me and I will not wound it with strife that has no winner. Even in the midst of crisis, if I remain calm, the Holy Spirit teaches me many lessons. Later, when things calm down, I can share them with others. These are diamonds I found in the fire of affliction and none can take them away from me. If I lose my temper, I will find nothing except dust and ashes. I hate that! The following scripture has been one of my spiritual pillars as a wife, mother and pastor. Please mediate on it:

“A servant of the Lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people” (2Tim 2:24)

Just in case you ask: ‘Is it possible to live this life without bitter quarrels?’ Is it possible to live in love? Is possible to maintain a pure testimony as a servant of God? Is it possible to be a successful wife living with an impossible husband? The answer is YES! It takes prayer, patience and faith! But by the grace of God and by the power of the Holy Ghost it is possible! Be filled with the Spirit and see what I mean!

In Christ I declare:

I am a child of God!

I am a servant of God!

I refuse to quarrel!

The Spirit in me is greater than the one in the world!

My life and my marriage are successful!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!     .

“Do not get drunk with wine, which will only ruin you; instead, be filled with the Spirit” (Eph 5:18)

This is God’s command: Be filled with the Holy Spirit! Once you become born again, do not waste time or opportunities. Obey God’s express command to be filled with the same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead!

Many believers are confused about this simple command. God is not the author of confusion!

First, let me tell you what this command is not:

To be filled with the Spirit is not the same as being sealed or being baptized with the Spirit into the body of Christ. It is also not the same thing as having the Spirit indwelling in you. All these blessings are God’s work to a new born again Christian. God does not command you to be sealed, baptized or indwelt by the Spirit. For if the Holy Spirit does not dwell in you, you are not a child of God (Rom 8:9) Lastly, to be filled with the Holy Spirit is not the same experience,  like in the Old Testament, when God suddenly empowered some of His servants to perform unusual actions.

To be filled with the Holy Spirit is a command of God. God expects you to listen and obey! God gives you the power to obey it! It is not a suggestion! Your answer should be like a soldier: “YES SIR!”

This is a practical advice: Immediately you become truly saved, you shall hear the voice of the Commander of the armies of heaven, the Captain of our salvation, Jesus Christ! He says to you: “Be filled with the Spirit!” To ignore His clear command to you it means that you are proud and rebellious. This is a very serious warning to believers! The unbelievers cannot be filled with the Holy Spirit! I am addressing the danger of rebellion in the churches! Even if you look religiously humble and submissive to the pastor, if you are not filled with the Holy Spirit, you are still a rebellious man! This sin will weaken you spiritually! Not only that, but it borders on witchcraft, for you have to discover occult means to resist the filling of the Holy Spirit. Selah!

What does it mean to be filled with the Holy Spirit?

Simply said, it means to receive divine power to live a successful and fruitful Christian life. The command describes a present action. It is not just an experience in the past. It is a moment by moment yielding of your body, soul and spirit to the flood of the Holy Ghost. He will enter your very being and He will change you. This is not just a sample of the power of life. This filling is like a sponge soaked in oil, changing its weight, its color and texture until it becomes something else. This is the testimony of all saints: Except you are filled with the Holy Spirit, you will not enjoy Christianity. As an immature believer, your heart will remain carnal, more or less unchanged and the Word of God will trouble you. You need to submit, trust and love the Holy Spirit to passionately desire be filled.

I read somewhere that the most difficult traffic sign to obey is ‘Yield’. To obey red (stop) or green (go) is easier. But to yield, you have to wait and honor the bigger lane as you want to enter from the side. If you ignore the sign, you shall have accident. For the cars on a main road will not stop for you. Even if you drive a Jeep or SUV, you still have to stop and wait for the smaller cars to pass before you. It is the same spiritually. You need to humble yourself, pray, wait, cooperate and humbly enter into the flow of the Holy Spirit. Then you shall be filled. Any form of resistance or ‘going against the traffic’ ends in spiritual damage or untimely death. Selah!

What are the main (visible) signs of the filling with the Spirit of God? In two words: power and joy!!! The churches are filled with sad believers. They are weak and sad. No miracles follow. The only explanation is that they are unrepentant and rebellious. They are not filled with the Holy Spirit.

This filling is compared with being drunk with alcohol. The main thing you can say about a drunkard is that he seems happy. But this is just for a time…Another thing you observe is that a drunkard lacks self-control. Alcohol is his master. He is lead where he does not want to go. Alcohol will give him false peace, false joy and false confidence. I read that more than 50% of all crimes and rapes are done by men under the influence of alcohol. Alcohol leads to a wasted life, emptiness, bitterness, shame and guilt…what a pity…

But the difference is clear: The Holy Spirit gives you the power to live successfully. He is the Spirit of revival. He strengthens your mind to think fast and well. Your emotions will not be wild. You will love Christ and hate the devil. You will love the Bible! You will love ministry! No confusion! No delay! No procrastination! No fear! Then there is this joy that words cannot describe but you feel it and men see it. It is very attractive and beatifies the face like no other cosmetics.

Lastly, this is a practical advice from a mother: single brethren, do you want to marry? Then be filled with the Holy Spirit! That is all that it takes! There is not one single believer that I know, who is filled with the Holy Spirit and is lonely. It just does not exist! If you are wise, you will not need more words than this!

In Christ I declare:

I am born again!

I am an obedient child of God!

I am filled with the Holy Spirit of God!

To God be all the glory!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Do not say to your neighbor, “Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give it”—when you have it with you” (PV 3:28)

Procrastination is defined as the choice to postpone an action that can be done immediately. It is a voluntarily delay even accepting the risk that postponing may worsen the matter. The reason why a man procrastinates is because he chooses to do other things that for him are less difficult or more interesting.

Procrastination is a sign of spiritual weakness. It is caused by fear, laziness, a weak will or lack of self-confidence. Postponing things that should be done today will only increase the stress and the level of anxiety. Guilt will be added and the fear of failure, of the future increases. Procrastinators have difficulty with organizing their time. They do not take the best advantage of opportunities and seasons. These feelings combined may promote further procrastination and it affects their health generally. This life style becomes a vicious circle and makes such a man to be a fool.   “So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin” (Jam 4:17)

Felix was the Roman Procurator in Judaea. His was known as a cruel and very corrupt man. He was also famous for his lust for women and a very wasteful life. He married three times, each time for political favor or pure lust.  The best known among his wives is Drusilla. He forced her to divorce her second husband and to marry him when she was just twenty years old.

Drusilla, his wife, was a very beautiful woman. She was a member of the infamous Herod family. Her uncles killed John the Baptist and Apostle James. Her grandfather, Herod the Great killed all the baby boys in Jerusalem trying to destroy Jesus. It is on record that he was ‘a Jewess’. That means she knew the scriptures. But all this religious knowledge was only superficial. She knew the letters but rejected Christ and His Spirit. History says that after her husband was transferred she went to live at Pompey with their son. They were both killed in the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.

The Lord told Ananias of Damascus that Paul “is a chosen vessel unto Me, to bear My name before the Gentiles and kings, and the children of Israel”   Apostle Paul, as a prisoner in chains, preached to them. He did his own part.

“As Paul talked about righteousness, self-control and the judgment to come, Felix was afraid and said, “That’s enough for now! You may leave. When I find it convenient, I will send for you.” (Ac 9:15; 24:25)

Paul preached to them about three basic doctrines. He told them that even if they are rich and famous, they are not right with God. They need to make peace with God. They need to repent and accept Christ, who is the righteousness of God. He also told them that the lust of the flesh is a sign of loving the world. The lustful Felix felt the conviction of God’s Spirit. Paul told them that they need the fruit of the Spirit which is true love and self-control. Lastly, Paul said that God sees everything and He will judge all sins. There is Day of Judgment and none can escape. Felix trembled at God’s Word but he refuse to obey his conscience. He told Paul that he will call him later, when it is ‘convenient’ for him. The word ‘convenient’ means when it is easier to perform or when it does not disturb my personal comfort. That time never came. He was soon transferred and never saw Paul again. There is no record that Felix or his wife Drusilla ever got saved.

I had a similar experience. About three years ago, a middle aged man, one of my husband’s friends, came to visit us. He comes from a rich family. I felt the ‘nudge’ of the Holy Spirit. I silently prayed in the Spirit for utterance. I told Him the plan of salvation found in Christ alone. I explained to him the doctrine of justification by faith alone. I told him that Christ died for his sins so that he should live eternally. I told him that he needs to be born again and not just religion. I stopped and waited. He kept quiet. I then asked him if we can pray. He said no. I asked him if he understood all I said. He answered me yes. He then repeated my ‘sermon’. Then I asked him why not praying? He said that he attends a church where he has invested a lot of money and he has many friends. Not only that, but soon the church will give him the title of a ‘knight’. Somehow he knew that Christ and ‘knights’ do not walk together. He said that he will go home and pray, and then come back to tell me his decision. He kept his word. Few days later he came and he said that he cannot accept Christ. That he is sorry… That we can still be ‘friends’… Some months later, we received an invitation for his ceremony of ‘knighthood’.

I saw him again two months ago. He is now campaigning to be a politician in our state. He looked stressed but when he saw me he tried to laugh. We greeted like old friends…. None brought the subject of Christ again…

As for me, I am sad but I have peace. I have given him the Word of life. The rest is in God’s hands.

Dear Reader, please remember: ‘Today is the day of salvation!’ We are commanded to make the best of every opportunity, to redeem the time for the days are filled with evil.

Procrastination is a demon that also affects your performance as a husband or wife. The unity of the Spirit in the marriage is very difficult to maintain. One will always be slower than the other. The spiritual agreement to pray will be lacking. The couple will encounter many unnecessary trials. There is no peace and joy in the home.

Is the destiny of your soul a joke to you? Is the Gospel of Christ Crucified just entertainment for you? Tomorrow does not belong to any of us. Whatever good you can do now, DO IT!

In Christ I declare:

I repent of the sin of procrastination!

Bu God’s grace and by the power of God’s Spirit, I will never procrastinate again!

Help me God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“If you are not concerned about the destiny of your friend’s soul, no matter what else you do for him, you are not a friend! You are his enemy!”

The prayer meeting was good. The Holy Spirit moves freely in our midst. There was a call to come and serve God in the church. Two different women testified that, for some weeks, they could not sleep because God is telling them to join the choir in the church. Both women sing very well, they belonged to a church choir in the past but since they came to father’s House they both decided to ‘take it easy’. Both these women are not in a good position to join the choir now. One is mourning the loss of her baby who died two months ago and the other is heavily pregnant. Naturally they are not the best candidates for the choir. But the Holy Spirit is Lord. They have to say YES to God and all other things will all into place.

We sang the chorus ‘I say Yes Lord yes, to Your will and to Your ways…’ on and on for about an hour. Our spirits were encouraged and we finally said a joyful and unconditional yes to God, to serve Him, in any capacity he desires. No more excuses! Then the sermon came with power and anointing. It was from Jeremiah 17.

“Cursed is the man who trusts in man

And makes flesh his strength,

Whose heart departs from the Lord.

For he shall be like a shrub in the desert,

And shall not see when good comes,

But shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness,

In a salt land which is not inhabited.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,

And whose hope is the Lord.

For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,

Which spreads out its roots by the river

And will not fear when heat comes;

But its leaf will be green,

And will not be anxious in the year of drought,

Nor will cease from yielding fruit (Jer 17:5-8)

The question is this: who do you trust? If you trust in yourself or any other man, in created things like silver or gold, then your life shall be like   ‘a shrub in the desert’. The life of a man who trusts in self is spiritually stagnant, boring, hopeless and lonely.

Trust in man ends in poverty, isolation, backsliding, constant anxiety and addiction to different sins. There is no victory. The enemies surround, threaten and attack constantly. God chastises His children by withdrawing the blessings He generously gave in the past. Idolatry always ends in emptiness and hopelessness.

But the trust in God Almighty manifests as a fruitful ever growing abundant relationship with God. The faithful man is spiritual stable and strong because his roots are in the right location. He is planted by the river of life. Even in ‘a year of drought’ (chronic sickness, joblessness, persecutions…) he is not afraid of death, poverty of defeat. His ‘neighbor’ is Jesus Christ, the water of life. And there is no fence of separation between them. That intimate relationship with God produces the assurance of salvation. The promises of God are fulfilled in his life.

What is the danger? Why so many believers who say they trust in God end up so badly? The answer is the heart!

The greatest idol is self. The heart is self-deceived and incurable wicked.

Self-deception means to lie to yourself until you believe that the lies are truth.  The heart is incurably sick. Only God can heal it!

It is easy to deceive yourself. We easily justify false beliefs about ourselves. The reason we do it is because deception brings comfort. Truth is good because it brings freedom and the power to change. But truth is painful and we reject the pain to change. Then we cling to lies, as an easy compromise. After sometimes, we convince ourselves that the lie is the same or even better than the truth we rejected.

The sin of deception is a very deep. It is also very common. All men are born with the capacity to lie and deceive. It cannot be detected and removed except by the power of the Holy Spirit. This is a classic example: A child is lying to his father. The father sees enough objective evidence that his son is lying to him. But because he so much wants his son to be a good boy who never lies, that he chooses to believe his son. For the father it is much easier to believe the lies of the son. This is how the son has succeeded to deceive his father.

What is the solution?

You cannot mature spiritually and be fruitful if self –deception is not radically dealt with at the Cross!

Acknowledge the sin of self-deception! Ask God to search your heart and to reveal this sin to you! Repent of it!

Passive hearing of a sermon without obeying the Word of God is self-deception (Jam 1:22)

Thank God for the Holy Spirit! Thank God for the gift of a new heart in Christ! Reject empty religion! Be born again!

In Christ I declare:

I am born again!

I trust in God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit!

I repent for self-deception and any other man-made idols!

Jesus is Lord over my life, my marriage, my home, my ministry, forever!

In Jesus name

Amen!

Jesus has not disappointed you in the past, so why doubt Him now?

“Through love serve one another…For the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” (Gal 5:13; Mat 20:28)

To serve it means to be useful to another; to be worthy of trust; to be faithful to another; to be a helper; to favor another above yourself; to bring satisfaction; to minister and pray for another; to wait for another, to give the proper respect to another; to perform all the duties of an office; to supply the needs of another; to accommodate and be flexible with another, to forgive, to promote another above yourself.  A servant is a waiter, a domestic helper, a secretary, an assistant, a follower, a nurse.

The opposite of serving means to hold back, to withdraw, to refuse, to resist or to become the master or a lord.

There are two types of believers, weak and strong (Rom 14). This distinction comes from the type of consciences they have. The conscience is a part of the human spirit. It is planted by God to tell us what is right and what is wrong; what is of God and what is of the devil. The conscience starts to develop in a child in the pre-school years. If the parents are believers they will use the word of God to train their child’s conscience. Soon, their child knows what the will of God is and what is not. Then he will grow to be a mature and strong believer. But in the case of unbelieving or legalistic parents, they insist on many rules and regulations, adding a false burden on their child’s conscience. When the child becomes an adult, he will be a weak and religious believer. This man is always afraid to sin. He always assumes that his sins will take him to hell. He is afraid to make God angry in a multitude of things.  A weak believer has an over-sensitive conscience. He is easily upset with things that are not so important. He is very slow in making decisions and often comes back to change them. He does not understand the freedom with have in Christ or the love that never fails.

When you think of marriage, think of serving. Success in marriage comes from serving one another through love, for the sake of Christ! Let me make it easier for you…

When you are ready to be useful to another, to be worthy of his trust, to be faithful unto death, to help and to bring satisfaction another, to minister and pray for another, to wait and to give the proper respect to another, to forgive, to assist, to follow and to nurse another back to health…and so much more…then you are ready to marry!

To serve another is not easy at all. That is why success in marriage does not come easy. There are many hindrances along the way. The flesh is selfish and proud. It wants to be bossy and in control. The flesh hates to be seen as a servant. Many ‘house girls’ marry rich men just so that they will be ‘madams’. For them, the idea to be a servant ‘again’ is crazy.

Let’s imagine that a strong Christian woman marries a spiritually weak man. Remember that strength and weakness is not physical but is connected with the conscience. For example, the wife can eat anything but the husband forbids ‘snails’ in the house, for example. This is because his mother told him that in her village, snails are forbidden. He does not take the time to study the Bible and see if such food is acceptable. What his mother said is final to him. The truth is that Jesus declared all foods clean and acceptable before God (Mk 7:19). The husband imagines that if he eats snails, he sins and he will go to hell. But the wife grew up in a house where snail stew was  a delicacy and she likes it very much. What will she do now? According to the law of a servant, she will chose to abstain from eating snails, so that her husband will not wound his already weak conscience.  If she wants to be like Jesus, she will learn to serve him as he is.  She has to be very sensitive to the (greater) needs of her husband and learn to ignore her own. Service means sacrifice. This is never easy. But this is what Jesus did. This is what love requires. The only option is that patiently, she will pray and wait for her husband to mature spiritually. Then one day, his ‘eyes will be open’ and he will see the power of the Cross, of sacrifice, love, humility and Christian service. And then, he will change…he will become a servant too. That is when marriage becomes balanced and sweet! Oh…

Dear wife, you cannot expect to marry a man ‘ready-made’. Even if he is a believer, you cannot expect to have an ‘easy life’ with a man who is so trained by his mother that he needs nothing from you again. Personally, I do not wait for any harvest in my husband’s character, except the one that comes from the seeds I planted in him over the years. Many tears have been the only rain for my seeds. But this is God’s law: Humble service and wisdom come before honor. I am just reaping a great harvest of ‘divine love’, from seeds I planted more than twenty years ago. At that time, it looked impossible that we can ever come to the unity of the Spirit necessary to start a church, for example. We were too different…To serve one another in love meant to cross oceans and cultures that have never met. But these days, this peculiar unity is manifesting; it is solid, real and strong. It is not just the seed. It is the abundant life harvest of the wonderful grace we found at the Cross, the promised blessings of God upon the ‘international field’ of our marriage and ministry.
Lastly…Do not dream less! Do not edit your vision! Do not limit God! Do not be tired to serve the other even in the absence of kisses and hugs! Do not give up on your destiny! God who planted it in your spirit is still watching over you! You can do all things, even serving your (difficult) spouse in love, thru Christ who strengthens you!

In Christ I declare:

I plant in the Spirit and I reap eternal life and blessings in my marriage!

Thru faith and patience I inherit the promises of God!

My marriage is promoted from seeds to harvest time!

To the glory of God!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!” (Ps 139:13-17)

Dear Heavenly Father I ask for forgiveness for the abortions I have done in the past, as a doctor and as a mother.
For the sake of Christ, I receive Your peace!”

God knows everything about you. God knows everything about your children. You are not a mistake. You were in God’s mind before you came on earth! You are a planned pregnancy! God formed you in the secret place where no human eye can see and no human hand can touch.
Today take a moment and praise the God who formed your inward parts! He started with one little cell and lovingly multiplies it to become a baby! All your organs function well without asking for help from you!
God covered you in your mother’s womb! The word means to place a screen over the baby, to protect and defend him or her from many enemies. There are so many reasons why a pregnancy can end in a miscarriage: the baby may be sick, the womb or the placenta may have a problem, the mother may be sick too. But even so, at just the right time, you came out alive and well. Praise God!

God made all the organs. He formed the inward parts. These words mean the kidneys, the heart and all the rest organs. Everything inside you, all your organs, visible or invisible, co-operate with the will of God. That is why you live! God made and protects your body. The words mean to be jealous over the wellbeing of the organs!
God protects your baby’s heart and mind, from the time of conception until the very end. No heart beats by itself. God counts the beats, the seconds and the days! You will not be cheated by untimely death! God knows His job! God is in control! Praise Him! I mean really praise God aloud with singing!
Today I praise God for His protection over me from my conception until the very end?
Today I praise God for His continuous personal loving protection over my children and grandchildren?
My life and my children we are signs and wonders of the only Living God!
From the bottom of my heart, we praise You Lord!

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. My very body declares the power and the glory of Almighty God! I can never feel ugly! I can never feel too short or too fat! He that made the stars and placed them in the sky, made me as well! God made me unique and special! His name is Wonderful and I am His child!
God placed a soul in my body. God breathe His Spirit inside my soul!

In Christ I declare:
I was conceived and born to know God and to praise Him!
I shall fulfill God’s purpose for me!
With long life God will satisfy me and show me His salvation!
My children are all stars and they shall all be saved!
We shall praise God forever!
In Jesus name
Amen!

“Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth: for Thy love is better than wine” (SS 1:2)

God the Son is the most romantic person in the whole universe. Can you imagine that some people, even among the believers, think that Jesus is a boring, hard master? The devil has deceived so many, especially about the character of God. From the time of Adam and Eve, satan has tried to convince men that he is the one who loves and cares, he knows what love is, he is the one who really understand us. This is the terrible power of sin…

When God molded Adam from the earth, He kissed him to live. We are created and live by the power of His breath and by passion of the Father’s kiss. Can you believe this? Are you afraid of too much passion? Are you afraid to get drunk with His wine? God’s first command is to love Him with all our heart and all our strength! Can a kiss be missing from all our heart? Can wine become water in all our strength? To the pure all things are pure, but to them who are corrupt, nothing is pure…Are you proud of your doubts?

The tragedy is that most people do not want to know the truth; so few believers are willing to pay the price for spiritual maturity. I look around and I see so many ‘baby Christians’. They like to come to a church where there is a little preaching combined with a lot of music and excitement. Much effort is spent in creating ‘the right atmosphere’ or ‘the right sound’; but at the end of the service the hearts of men remain unchanged. It is in fact a double tragedy because the people do not even know that they are unchanged, at least not for a long time. The emotions are swelled with the personal charisma of the preacher or the voice of the singers. People cry and ‘worship’ and all along they are ignorant that they do not touch the heart of the Father. I see that the hem of Jesus is too clean…Why so few come and touch it with needy sickly trembling dusty fingers longing for a drop of life…

In Hebrew, the name Solomon is translated ‘peace’. It is one of God’s very powerful names. It reveals the best God has for His children. It means to be perfect, wealthy, healthy, friendly, safe, happy and whole. But this is another wonderful revelation: the word for his bride, the Shulammite, comes from exactly the same root. Think of it…One is a rich and great king. The other is just a village girl whom he loves. The gap made by the world has been closed by the love that never fails. The Cross has made them one! Bride and bridegroom become one in Christ! May you long for the kiss of God, for the wine of His lips…I pray…

In Christ I declare:
Jesus has just kissed my heart!
I am drunk with the Holy Spirit!
I love God!
In Jesus name
Amen!

“Do not despise this small beginning, for the eyes of the Lord rejoice to see the work begin” (Zech 4:10)
(A Nigerian ke-ke)

“Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away” (SS 8:7)

Brother G started attending our church about seven years ago. He was saved but found no joy in his former fellowship. He had to change his address and with it, he decided to look for another church. One Sunday, he went to a church not far from ours. He said that he became very restless and could not even sit down. He came out and started walking down the street. He then saw our sign board and on the spot he made up his mind to enter in. He said that immediately he felt at home. At the end of the service he went to the head usher and told him that he wants to join the ushering ministry. He told me he never did that in the past. He said that because he is naturally very shy he decided to push himself beyond his comfort zone. He also made a vow to God that he will come every Friday and Saturday to clean the sanctuary and arrange the chairs for the Sunday service. Nobody appointed him. Lead by the Holy Spirit he appointed himself to do this humble ‘unglamorous’ but very necessary work for God. As his pastor, I am a witness that he has been faithful to his vow ever since.

He comes from a poor family. His mother had two children for two different men. She could not take care of them. When her son was one year old, she gave him up to a richer aunt living in Warri. Bro G  grew up there with his cousins. But the aunt sent only her children to school. G worked in the house and in her shop. He managed to go to school much later. When he was twenty, he left his aunt’s place and hired a room for himself. He worked as a driver and did other odd jobs. He gathered some money and bought a printer. That is how he started a ‘business center’. He also went into a partnership with a company and drove a ke-ke for them, paying daily the rental fees. At the end of two years, the ke-ke became his (a ke-ke is a covered tricycle used here as taxi).

When he was about twenty five, his birth mother came from the village to look for him. That is the first time he saw her as an adult. She explained that she could not take care of him that is why she gave him to the aunt. He was very angry that she ‘abandoned’ him and refused to accept her apology. She went away crying…

Brother G is now 37. He is a very committed Christian. Each Friday and Saturday I see his ke-ke parked in front of our church. I know that he is inside cleaning the sanctuary. He never had a girl-friend. He never dated any girl.  He is very shy. For the past two years he has been coming to my office telling me about his desire to marry. He told me that in the past, if he likes a sister and tries to talk to her, his tongue will ‘seize’. He will be unable to talk properly and begins to stammer. That is how his heart got ‘broken’ three times. In Nigeria, the women generally like to marry confident men. When the sisters saw him struggling to even talk, they rejected him immediately. To make matters worse, he does not know how to dress properly. He has no ‘fashion sense’ at all. His shirts are too big for him ‘flying’ on his (too big) old man’s style of trousers. He also told me that the sisters hate his ke-ke. They could have preferred a car (of course). To add to his problems, he is a Genotype AS. That means he has to marry only a woman whose Genotype is AA. This is to avoid the risk of having children born with Sickle cell anemia (This is the advice we give to the young people in our church who desire to marry).

Each time Bro G came to my office, I encouraged and prayed with him. I told him that the problem is not the tongue, is not the clothes, is not the ke-ke and is not the Genotype. His problem is that he has not found his own ‘rib’. I told him to be patient and continue to serve God and that one day, he will meet his bride. The sign that the sister is his true bride will be this: she will love him exactly as he is and she will not be afraid to change him for the better. I also told him that she will be a mature Christian, a woman who has suffered but by the grace of God she overcame her past. I told him that she will be about the same age with him and that she is a beautiful woman. Her sufferings, combined with the work of the Holy Spirit, have made her a humble and mature woman of God. I told him that she will have her own hand-work and she will never be a liability to him. She will be a true God given helper, an encourager, a challenger and a true blessing to him. I could see it in his eyes… It was in my office that he learned how to dream. For most poor people all over the world, romance is too much a luxury. But he is a child of God. That was my confidence in encouraging him. Nothing is too hard for God to do for His children.  At the beginning he was even afraid to say ‘Amen!’ He will open his mouth and forget to close it when I will tell him things about his future bride. At the beginning, he will always look down. But with time, his faith increased. The breakthrough came sometimes last year when he said that now he believes that I am not just his pastor, but his mother in Christ. It took him almost seven years to receive this revelation.

Each time we prayed, he always knelt down… I saw him bowing his head to God Almighty… His humility and faith encouraged me too… I knew in my heart that one day, all these words will come true…I rejoiced, Oh… I rejoiced!

During our Christmas and Jesus Mega Party program, he volunteered to use his ke-ke to carry the female ushers free of charge. That is how he ‘discovered’ sister L. He told me later that his ‘eyes got opened’. He will take extra care with her. He will take L and her daughter home every evening.

One day, Sister L was surprised when he wanted to know her Genotype. He begged her to come with him to the laboratory not telling her why he is interested in the result. Eventually she agreed. The next day the result came. She was AA. Usually so shy, Bro G got so excited… He jumped and jumped with the paper in his hand. He said: “I knew it! I knew it!” Then they entered his ke-ke to go home. In front of her parents’ house, with the traffic and the dust all over them, Bro G took her hand and asked her to be his wife. He had an engagement ring that he bought in the market. Sister L said ‘yes!’ Later, she told me that the same anointing that came upon her in my office, that same anointing and joy suddenly came upon her in the humble ke-ke in such a way that it was easy for her to say ‘yes’. The day was 17^th of February, 2014, exactly one year from the day she gave me her wedding shoes. The dust and (the ‘cheap’ two sizes too big) ring could not stop the angels jumping for joy… Is that not wonderful? The eternal God counts our days and moments… What a beautiful story of love and faith!

When L came to my office the next day she was happy like a teenager in love.  The first question I asked her was this: does Bro G stammer? She laughed and said not at all. She told me that he is very ‘talkative’. She said that she loves that ke- ke because ‘God is in it’. She told me that she has ‘a designer plan’ how to improve his clothes, that she will sew them all. Then I looked into her eyes and with all the confidence of heaven and earth I said: ‘Congratulations! You are indeed Bro G’s bride!’ The long awaited sign has finally come true!

Then Sis L wanted to meet his mother. He was silent for a time. They went to see his aunt who was surprised that G will get married to such a beautiful girl. After the visit, L asked him if this lady is birth mother. He said no. She insisted that she wants to see his ‘real’ mother, to thank her for bringing her future husband to earth. For the first time since they knew each other, he got very angry. He refused to tell her the truth. For a moment he started stammering again…

Later in my office, L told me that she had to fast and pray for him to open up his heart and mouth and to tell her about his pain of rejection. He promised to inquire about his mother. One day, his sister, her husband and their three children came to visit him. They said that they located their mum and they want to go and visit her. He said that he will come along. L said that she will come too. That is how one early morning; all of them went to the village in ‘the bush’ where the mother lives. It was a long journey, by bus and by motorbike. L told me that to her great surprise, bro G paid the transport fee for everybody. When they arrived at the village, they were told that the mother is in a church. They were all surprised because the mother was a pagan and never attended church before. They went to look for her there. When she heard that her only two children came to look for her, she ran bare feet on the village road thanking God for such a miracle. The pastor and the villagers soon gathered. That is how they discovered that two years ago, mama G became born again and the whole village knew that she was praying for a miracle to see her children. There was praise and worship, clapping of hands and dances of joy. She ran to the kitchen and cooked rice and stew for the ‘visitors’. Her daughter told her that L is her soon to be daughter in law (in love). That she was the one who interceded for this miracle of reconciliation, love and victory. They hugged and praised God and danced some more! The next week G’s mother came to Warri to stay with her son. She wanted to meet L’s parents and to thank them for bringing her to the world as a wife to her son. She promised that from now on, by the grace of God, she will be the best mother she can be to her children! Wonderful! Praise the Lord!

The wedding between Bro G and Sis L is coming soon. Please pray for them. Living here in Nigeria, I have learned so many things, holy beautiful things of God. One thing is sure: When poor people who have nothing and nobody except God by their side become vessels of honor for the Master’s use, their faith blooms like a rose in the desert. That is when the true testimony of grace and glory begins! I testify that I have seen God smile over Warri, Nigeria! Praise the Living God, who loves ‘the nobodies’ of this world, who is mindful of the humble state of His servants and who makes all things beautiful in His own time!

Dear reader, you too, be encouraged today and forever!

In Christ I declare:

Jesus is the same, yesterday, today and forever!

God is faithful!

God is love!

God is good!

All the time!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away” (SS 8:7)

This is a beautiful testimony of the power of eternal redemption found in Christ alone. It is also a beautiful love story between a man and woman, both true believers in Christ. Soon, we shall celebrate their wedding in our church. As a pastor and a mother in Christ I am very happy. I know both of them for more than seven years. We all love a beautiful romantic love story. Let me share with you a little from their testimony of grace…

Sister L started attending our church about seven years ago. Before then, she was the unofficial ‘second wife’ to a ‘rich man’. They were never married properly. She was in that oppressive relationship for more than five years. She had two children for that man. One died but her daughter survived. When she came to our church she was a broken woman with no dreams left, except to take care of her child. She is from a poor home. She is a dress maker. She came to my office and she told me her story… She was afraid to trust anybody…. But there was also good news… She has just given her life to Christ and decided to serve God in our church.

I told her that God loves her and from now on she will never be the same again. I also counseled her to separate from the father of her daughter. He was a married man with children and he will never marry her. She told me that she will not be able to pay rent with the money she makes from her work. Then I told her to go back to stay with her old parents. She agreed. The father of her daughter became violent and tried to take the girl from her. He told her that if she does not give him his daughter, he will not contribute any money for her welfare. In Nigeria it is very hard to ‘force’ a man to do what is right. It was not an easy battle. She prayed and prayed. She attended all the services in the church. She became baptized with the Holy Spirit. Every week I will see her coming to clean the sanctuary. She will pray in tongues for hours. She had t=no other hope than God. I saw her getting stronger and finally the war was over. The man abandoned them and stopped stalking them. She started living with her parents, sewing to pay for the food and the daughter’s school fees. She became a very good worker. Soon, she joined the ushers’ ministry. Also, she is one of the volunteer workers who designed and sewed the costumes for our yearly drama “The Nativity”. This is how her life went on for about five years…

Early last year, I called her to my office and asked her for her plans of marriage. She is now in her mid-thirties. She is a very beautiful woman, tall and slim, looking much younger than her age. Her daughter looks more like her sister. Both of them are very well behaved, humble, hardworking and faithful. Since she came to our church I have never heard from anybody that she behaved improperly towards any brother.

She told me that she does not have any plans to marry. That she does not think any brother will be interested to marry a woman like her. That she has dedicated her life to serve God and to be the best mother she can be. She told me that in her family they gave her ‘a title’ which translated from the urrhobo language it means ‘Second-hand-woman-with-child-who-will-never-marry-again’. I immediately rebuked her for accepting such ‘a title’, even if jokingly. With the authority I had as her pastor I destroyed the power and the effect such an occult declaration had upon her spirit. She said ‘Amen!’ I then told her to go home and think about God’s love and His plan for her to get married. I told her that if she believes my words, then she should go and buy her wedding shoes and bring them to me. I will keep them as a point of contact for her wedding day. We then prayed and the Holy Spirit fell on her. She was filled with joy. I have never seen her so happy! Two weeks later, she came, shaking with happiness. In her hands, there was a plastic bag with a pair of fancy high healed silver shoes. I knew that these shoes were much more expensive than what she can afford. She told me that God provided the money miraculously and that now she believes that she will be a bride. She told me that God gave her the design of her wedding dress and she will sew it herself.  She gave me the shoes on the 17^th of February 2013. Nobody in her family knew about the shoes or her faith in marriage. She decided to keep it a secret. In a family of unbelievers, that was wisdom indeed.

Exactly one year later, on the 17^th of February 2014, to her greatest surprise, a wonderful brother in Christ here in the church, proposed to her. Brother G is a fellow usher. He loves God, loves L and her daughter. He too has a great testimony… but that will be in another letter…

For now, just let’s give thanks to God who heals broken hearts, who plants seeds of life instead of evil, dreams instead of wounds and provides joy beyond words. May other single sisters, use this testimony as a point of contact! May God grant you true love, on this earth and even everlasting! For God is willing and able to do it, even much more than you can ask or imagine! Praise the God of sister L! Praise His Holy Name!

In Christ I declare:

Brother G and Sister L shall be happily married with children!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“To the Jews who had believed in Him Jesus said: If you hold to My teaching you are really My disciples. Then you will know the truth and the truth shall set you free…If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed!” (Jn 8:31-36)

Examine yourself! Are you a free soul of are you a slave? There is no other option.

Jesus Christ died on the Cross to set you free!

The devil deceived Adam and Eve to make them and you his slaves!

Truth and faith in the Word of God sets you free!

Deception lies and idols will bring you into bondage!

This is the definition of freedom:

Freedom means to be saved, to have eternal life and to live in the center of the will of God!

Freedom means to fear God and no one else!

Freedom is the opposite and the end of slavery and bondage (to sin, to the law, to the devil and to the world)!

Freedom means the absence of a wicked force coming from outside and opposing you when making decisions!

Freedom destroys the evil powers of violence, manipulation and intimidation coming against your soul!

Freedom eliminates your enemies!

Freedom separates you from the evil power of another who wants to control you, to be your master by force!

Freedom means the power to be out spoken and honest; to speak the truth in love always!

Freedom means to have the boldness to conceive and execute a project as God leads you to do!

Freedom means the end of hindrances and frustrations that slowed you down in the past!

Freedom means making progress in life and moving fast into your God given destiny!

Freedom means to be a child of God and Spirit filled!

Freedom means to be healed and delivered by the Blood of Jesus!

May the blessings of true freedom in Christ be manifested in your life from now on and forever!

In Christ I declare:

I am a child of God!

I hold to the teaching of Jesus!

His truth has set me free!

I am blessed!

I am healed!

I am delivered!

In Jesus name

Amen!

Our prayer meeting was very good. At exactly 5 PM there was a big storm outside. Because of that many came late, wet from the rain. If I was the one, maybe I could not have had the faith to come at the closing of the service. I could have stayed home because of the rain. It is possible that I am too much a perfectionist. Thank God that our congregation is not like that. They decided that one minute in the presence of God is worth the coming. What a reward for me as their pastor and teacher… My students came thru the rain, not to receive money or fried chicken. They came just to have an encounter with the Living God, to hear His Word, to pray, to worship and to receive His Spirit. I was greatly encouraged tonight. Thank You, our Father! The following was our sermon.

“Our God is in heaven; He does whatever pleases Him.

But their idols are silver and gold, made by human hands.

They have mouths, but cannot speak; eyes, but cannot see.

They have ears, but cannot hear, noses, but cannot smell.

They have hands, but cannot feel; feet, but cannot walk nor can they utter a sound with their throats.

Those who make them will be like them and so will all who trust in them” (Ps 115: 3-8)

Psalm 115 reminds us of the eternal difference between God and other man made gods. The humanity is separated in two groups: the believers in Jesus Christ and the idol worshippers. Each man shall eventually resemble the thing he loves the most. If you worship God Almighty then you shall be like Jesus! If you worship a goat you shall behave like a goat! This is one of the greatest revelations of the Bible. Jesus said: “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Mt 6:21)

The pagans are ignorant and foolishly bold. They persecute and mock the believers asking ‘where is your God?’ This is because without God’s revelation to man, no one can know Him. The answer is that our God is in heaven and He is sovereign over all, including the unbelievers. We all trust somebody. We trust God and they trust the idols.

The word ‘trust’ appears four times in Psalm 115. In Hebrew it means to boldly run inside a place of refuge, to be surrounded by hope, to have a sure faith and confidence of its protection. Inside that place of trust, no enemy can penetrate. This description applies for them who trust in God. But for them who trust in idols, in gods made by human hands or imaginations, the place they run to will disappoint them. It is a shaky place surrounded by anxiety, filled with confusion and despair. All sinners know it very well; the tragedy of a hopeless situation where no prayer works and no man can help.

The Ten Commandments clearly forbid idolatry. God is jealous. He punishes the idol worshippers to the fourth generation.

“And God spoke all these words: “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.

“You shall have no other gods before Me” (Ex 20:1-3)

The Psalmist helps us to better understand the disappointment, the deception and the tragedy of idolatry. The man made gods promise great things but are not able to deliver. There are totally deaf, dumb, blind and paralyzed. Their worshippers become as their idols. The meaning of the words in Hebrew describes perfectly the utter uselessness of idols.

The idols cannot do the following actions:

*They cannot speak, study, command, answer, teach, promise or subdue circumstances

*They cannot see, prophesy, experience joy or provide

*They cannot hear intelligently, understand, obey, be a witness or be attentive, focused or diligent

*They cannot smell, enjoy life, breathe or anticipate happiness

*They cannot feel, touch, make contact or make friends

*They cannot walk, behave well, make progress, go forward, be successful, lead, grow spiritually or travel.

If you worship idols you shall become dumb, blind, deaf, unhappy, isolated and poor. God forbid! God forbid!

An idol is anything that competes with the worship of God in your secret heart. Anything that you love too much, that you spend too much time thinking of, that you feel dying if you lose it. Search your heart and pray. Is there any secret idol in your heart? Do you get easily sidetracked by negative words and difficult circumstances? Self is the greatest idol. Are there things you think you can accomplish by your own power?

A young man came to my office recently. He said to me: “Pastor, I want to marry. I did not find the lady who will be my wife, but that is not my problem. To marry is easy for me. My only problem is that I do not have money to prepare for the wedding”. I told him that he worships idols. That he worships self. Because of that, God will not give him the money he so much desires.

May God open your mouth to pray!

May God open your eyes to see King Jesus!

May God open your ears to hear what the Spirit says to the churches!

May God help to smell the fragrance of Christ and to enjoy life!

May God help you to touch the helm of His garments and the hand of a needy friend!

May God help you to grow spiritually and to make progress in life!

In Jesus name

Amen!

“But he (Jesus) was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was on Him; and with His stripes we are healed” (Is 53:5)

“Dear Heavenly Father, please answer this prayer!

Holy Spirit, please touch and heal Your child!

Nothing is too hard for You!

I command every evil spirit of infirmity to leave you now!

I destroy every occult spell on you now!

I quench that fever now!

I speak life and strength into your body now!

Every organ shall function well now!

This healing shall bring glory to God!

In Jesus name,

Amen!”

Now open your mouth and say it every day:

“BY YOUR STRIPES, I AM HEALED!”

“BY YOUR STRIPES, I AM HEALED!”

“BY YOUR STRIPES, I AM HEALED!”

You are healed!

Glory to God!